


Magnus and Bane

by Adaline_Blooms



Category: Shadowhunters (TV), The Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, BAMF Magnus Bane, Bodyguard, Dark Magnus Bane, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Enemies to Lovers, Eventual Romance, Hurt Alec Lightwood, Hurt Magnus Bane, Hurt/Comfort, Jekyll and Hyde, M/M, Magic Depletion, Malec, Multiple Personalities, Protective Alec Lightwood, Soft Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood, Soulmates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2021-01-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 20:14:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 22,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25102240
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Adaline_Blooms/pseuds/Adaline_Blooms
Summary: One warlock. Two personalities. Bane was dark. Magnus was light.Shadowhunter Alec Lightwood comes to know and love both.But, ultimately only one version can remain if the warlock wants to survive.Malec AU | Alec becomes Magnus Bane's bodyguard | Jekyll & Hyde vibe (split personalities)
Relationships: Magnus Bane & Alec Lightwood, Magnus Bane/Alec Lightwood
Comments: 67
Kudos: 209





	1. Alec Meets Bane

**Author's Note:**

> Note that this story in no way aims to describe actual disassociative identity disorder. It's just a fantasy Malec AU fanfic with characters that are not mine. Hope you enjoy the story!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A hundred years ago, something ripped Magnus Bane’s life apart. He was no longer the kind, freewheeling warlock he once was. He struggled with the shattered pieces, ultimately becoming "Bane" - the dark and powerful High Warlock of Brooklyn.
> 
> Bane meets Shadowhunter Alec Lightwood, setting off a chain of events which unlocks something in the warlock, allowing his lighthearted alter ego "Magnus" to re-enter the world after nearly a century locked away.

Alec Lightwood was nearing the end of a late-night patrol with his siblings when he encountered a noisy group of shax demons battling a warlock near the edge of city park.

“That’s the high warlock, Alec,” Jace shouted from somewhere off to the side. Ah, the High Warlock of Brooklyn, known only as “Bane” to Nephilim and Downworlders alike. Quickly, Alec unleashed an arrow aimed at a demon that had sprouted up behind the warlock. An unearthly shriek filled the air until it vanished into a reeking puff of black smoke.

As the Shadowhunters jumped further into the fray, Alec guessed the battle had started long before they arrived. The warlock’s stream of magic eked out in small, stuttered spurts as if it might be running out. His olive-colored skin was covered in a sheen of sweat, and as Alec moved closer, he felt waves of distressed exhaustion wafting from the warlock. 

Together, they all made quick work of the remaining demons. Bane managed to blast the final one and then started to sway on his feet awkwardly. He looked over to Alec with a startled gaze, as if he had only now noticed the sudden company of Shadowhunters. A moment later, he dropped to his knees.

Alec reached him just in time to stop the mage's body from crumpling completely to the ground. He held him upright. “Are you okay?”

Bane looked up to him but didn’t speak. He breathed heavily and made no effort to mask his warlock mark; yellow-green cat eyes shone brightly, but they were unfocused.

“Are you hurt?” Alec tried again, working to shake away the sudden flutter in his chest that bloomed when he took in the sight of the warlock’s unsteady but golden gaze.

Before he could get an answer, though, Bane’s enchanting cat eyes slipped closed, and his body slumped heavily into Alec’s arms.

“Was he poisoned?” Alec’s sister, Izzy, asked as she came to kneel beside them. She began looking over the unconscious warlock’s body. “That’s odd. I don’t see any wounds.”

“Let’s get him to the institute,” Jace suggested, already turning to lead the way. Alec shifted Bane’s limp body in his arms, scooping him up off the ground before quickly following his Parbatai.

\--

A little more than an hour after the battle, Alec sat beside an infirmary bed, waiting for the warlock to awaken. Alec’s father had instructed him to pack an away bag and then accompany Bane to his office. Though he was confused by the order, he was raised as a solider and didn’t ask questions.

Eventually, Bane began to stir. His face winced in pain a few times before his eyelids slowly dragged open. The golden cat eyes were still on display, causing Alec to suck in a surprised gulp of air as he stared down at them. The eyes were bright and piercing; something about them kept taking the Shadowhunter’s breath away.

It took another moment for Bane to fully awaken, but once comprehension was again within his grasp, he jolted upright on the bed. “What am I doing here?” he rasped angrily, sniffing the air. He began patting himself down to check for signs of injury.

Alec watched the man’s hands as they moved, nails painted black and fingers adorned with numerous silver rings. “You collapsed after banishing the last shax demon in a random sighting earlier tonight. We brought you here until you regained your strength.”

Recollection stirred in the warlock’s eyes, which suddenly shifted to a normal shade of deep brown. Alec offered him water, but Bane simply pushed at the glass in Alec’s grasp, swatting it away with a backhanded wave.

“I didn’t ask for assistance from the Shadowhunters.”

“Would you rather we left you alone to fight them off? Or, left you in the middle of the city after you passed out?”

Alec smirked when Bane simply bit his lip to suppress a growl, saying nothing further.

“If you’re feeling well enough, my father would like to meet with you.”

“Your father?”

“Yes, Robert Lightwood.”

Bane rolled his eyes. “Of course, this night just gets better and better. So, you must be Alexander, the head of the New York Institute’s oldest son.”

“Alec,” he corrected and gestured toward the door. Bane shook his head in exasperation but slid off the bed and made his way to the infirmary’s exit.

\--

The high warlock and the young Shadowhunter sat in the briefing room of the New York Institute, listening to Robert Lightwood explain the proposal.

“Absolutely not!” Bane nearly barked. “I will not consent to having a Shadowhunter stationed in my lair. You make me regret my decision to inform you of my current … condition.”

Robert continued, “Please don’t regret that decision. We are grateful that you came to us last week to notify us of the sudden change in your magic. As High Warlock, you work closely with the institute to keep peace during these dark times. We all need to know what we’re dealing with.”

Alec sat silently as he tried to keep up with the current conversation while piecing together elements of prior discussions his father seemed to have already had with Bane. 

Apparently, Bane had recently experienced an unknown affliction, which significantly weakened his magical abilities. He had shared this development with his father as a courtesy, despite his deep distrust of Shadowhunters in general. Alec took that decision to mean Bane valued integrity, regardless of his angry, dark demeanor.

Now, Alec’s father wanted to provide Bane with the protection of his institute … by relegating Alec himself to become a temporary personal security detail for the warlock.

“There’s no need for this,” Bane persisted. “I have some of the wisest warlocks in the world working with me to find out what happened and how to restore my full power. It should only be a matter of time.”

“But what happens until then, though?” Robert asked. “Do you really think that tonight’s attack was a random occurrence? What if someone is targeting you? This impacts the Shadowhunters of New York as well.”

Bane crossed his arms over his chest, pursing his lips and scowling. “Though it’s not at full strength, I still have my magic. I can still protect myself. And the institute’s wards that I built remain fully operational, do they not?”

“True. But, from what you’ve explained and what happened tonight, it looks like not only are your powers much weaker than usual, but the magic you do still have depletes itself quite quickly. Is my understanding correct?”

Alec watched rage flash across Bane’s face, certain that the warlock loathed hearing a Shadowhunter lecturing him over his own magic.

“And you don’t want to alert the local warlocks to the situation just yet until you have more information so as not to create a panic, is that right?”

Robert was answered with a stoic nod from the mage before he continued.

“This is for your protection, Bane. You need additional security until you can find the source of this recent magic diminution. And Alec, well he can benefit from a little time spent away from the Institute.”

Alec grimaced at his father’s words but remained silent as well, avoiding Bane’s now curious expression aimed right at him. Robert still wasn’t over the fact that Alec had refused to marry Lydia Branwell – even to help further the Lightwood family name.

“You’re asking me to trust more than I think I can, Lightwood,” Bane finally spoke. “How do I allow such a thing, when it’s evident that Shadowhunters are responsible for unleashing something sinister to feed on my power?”

“Circle members,” Alec interjected the distinction.

“Still, Shadowhunters,” Bane reiterated matter-of-factly. Alec moved to argue, but Robert cut him off.

“Enough. Though we don’t know anything for sure, and it might very well be the Circle who’s behind this, it doesn’t change the fact that you can only benefit from our help – as difficult as that is for you to accept, Bane.”

Bane stood up suddenly and slammed his hands against the table in front of them, conceding. “Fine. But this should be sorted out in a matter of days, and when it is, you _will_ back off. This does not give you any clout or say in Downworld affairs – now or in the future.”

Bane rubbed his temple, feeling a headache forming. Ignoring it, he turned to Alec. “I’m sure you need time to gather your things. I will see you tomorrow then?” Bane moved quickly to the door.

“I have everything I need here.” Alec pointed to the small duffel bag slung over his shoulder.

Bane glared at him, irritated to not even have a final night alone in peace. “Of course you do. Well, hurry up then.” He tiredly swung his arm, and a portal immediately appeared, ready to take them to the High Warlock’s penthouse loft.


	2. Alec Meets Magnus

Alec scanned the layout of Bane’s loft from the center of the living area; the two had just portaled in from the Institute. The Brooklyn penthouse apartment was expansive, eclectic, and warmly lit.

“The guest room is over there,” Bane murmured unenthusiastically, pointing to the right. He sluggishly walked across the room to a drink cart. As he had expected, creating that portal further depleted his already-diminished magical reserve.

Alec nodded and promptly retreated to set his bag down. The guest room was considerably larger than his bedroom back at the Institute. He strode to the large window and shifted the drapes to see the night sky, still dark as it was just after one in the morning. He surveyed the guest room quickly. Finding nothing amiss he rejoined Bane, who had just settled onto one of the couches with a martini in his hand.

“What are you doing?” Bane asked sharply, watching with narrowed eyes as Alec looked methodically around the loft.

“I was going to run a perimeter check.”

Bane scoffed. “I have wards for that.”

“Still, I should probably go ahead and search the- “

“No need,” Bane insisted, irritated for having to repeat himself. “I would feel it if any malicious creature came near this building.”

Alec stared at him, considering the response. He went against his own judgment and acquiesced, though, taking a seat on the edge of a blue armchair which sat across from the stubborn warlock.

Bane sipped his drink while absently tapping the glass table beside him. Minutes passed in silence, neither man speaking for a long time.

Finally, Bane spoke. “So, what did you do to piss your father off?” 

“What do you mean?”

“I assume there’s some explanation why he selected _you_ for such a boring assignment, babysitting a Downworlder – especially one who has no need for you to do so.”

Alec shrugged and looked down at his boots, hiding a suddenly taut expression; his stoic demeanor fell away. “Someone needed to do it.”

“What was it that he said?” Bane continued, aware of but indifferent over the Shadowhunter’s sudden reluctance. “Ah, yes. I recall him saying that you could use some time away from the Institute. I’m curious, Shadowhunter. What did he mean by that?”

Alec wrung his hands together as he answered, “He’s not pleased that I recently refused an arranged marriage.”

Bane raised an eyebrow before finishing his drink, trying to remain interested. “Arranged marriage, huh? Here I thought Nephilim considered themselves more progressive these days.”

“The partnership was meant to strengthen my father’s standing with the Clave.”

“Of course. And, yet you refused. That’s very rogue for a Shadowhunter if I do say so myself, isn’t it? Your kind are built to be loyal soldiers from a young age.”

“It was something I couldn’t do. Even … even if it disappointed my father.”

“So not a good match then?” Bane jested carelessly, even though he detected this was a sensitive subject for the young man in front of him.

“It just … it wouldn’t work out. Lydia, she understood that.”

“Was she not pretty enough for you?” He questioned mischievously. A slight, close-lipped smile formed.

Alec stared pointedly at the floor, deciding on his response. He found himself surprised to realize he didn’t mind telling Bane the truth. He wasn’t fazed by the warlock’s abrasive front. “Well, no. I’m … I am gay.”

Alec was still looking down and didn’t see the mage’s eyes widen ever so slightly.

Bane stared, unblinking, startled by the Shadowhunter’s candidness. He opened his mouth to speak but was stopped by a sudden jarring sensation in his chest, his dimmed magic finally alerting him to an oncoming danger. The hasty ping of breached wards reverberated throughout the weak tendrils of his magic.

“My wards!” he gasped, jumping to his feet and rushing up to the terrace.

“Bane, wait,” Alec hollered, chasing after him as he pulled out his bow, already nocked with an arrow. He followed the warlock upstairs and onto the rooftop just in time to see a croucher demon drop from above him and land on Bane’s back. The demon and warlock tumbled to the ground and rolled into the railing.

All in the same breath, Alec pulled back his bowstring, aimed and released the arrow, effortlessly taking out the demon. “You okay?”

Bane nodded, shaken. He moved to his feet to scan the darkling area, squinting through the mirk of the night. Croucher demons never traveled alone. Sure enough, both men immediately heard growls and scratches approaching from the darkness. They anticipated nothing less than a small hoard of slimy creatures.

Alec switched weapons, activating his seraph blade in time to pierce a lone demon that lunged at him from the shadows.

From the corner of his eye, he saw another two demons scrambling toward Bane, who was able to dispatch of them with a small burst of magic.

Alec sliced through a group of three crouchers as he charged further onto the rooftop. He clambered onto a table, using it as a steppingstone to hop onto the ledge of the high terrace wall to gain a better view of the situation.

Looking down to check on Bane, he saw the warlock shuffling backward defensively against a wall, his enervated magic still effectively blasting demons into nothingness.

A split-second later Alec felt an abrupt force crash into his side, setting him off balance. He immediately wrestled with the demon that had collided into him, but the struggle to remove it threatened his sense of balance on top of the narrow ledge.

Bane seared the final demon that snarled at his feet. With a weary huff, he looked up just in time to see the Shadowhunter lose a precarious battle of balance and drop off the building’s ledge, disappearing into a deadly freefall toward the streets below.

“Alec!” Bane shouted, and magic shot from his hands before he even had a chance to command it to do so. Streams of orange sparks lurched across the terrace, propagating over the ledge and chasing down the side of the building.

Bane staggered forward, making his way to the spot where Alec had just fallen from. With the last of his magic still flowing from him, he peered over to see its orange wisps rapidly vining around the fallen Shadowhunter, plucking him from the deadly plummet and suspending him in midair.

Bane struggled determinedly as he called his magic back, slowly hauling Alec up to the roof.

Even during his freefall, Alec had managed to pierce the menacing demon who had toppled him. Now, covered in ash and ichor, he tried to catch his breath as he literally floated in a bubble of magic. His mind realized the sparking licks of light that wrapped around him had just saved him from certain death on the city pavement below.

The trip back up to the roof seemed painstakingly slow, but the warlock magic sustained, and a couple moments later, Bane shifted his arms to drop Alec from the air and safely onto the concrete ground beside him.

Bane collapsed immediately, his breathing heavy and haggard. Alec himself felt too stunned to move, his own breathing still not under control.

After several moments, Alec reached over and touched Bane’s shoulder. Bane raised his head from the ground feebly; his golden cat eyes had resurfaced and were staring up at Alec anxiously.

“Are you hurt?” Bane managed to croak out.

“No. Are you?”

“No, but I ... I’ve had better nights. I’m afraid I can’t bring myself to stand,” he admitted begrudgingly through heaving gasps.

Alec ignored the dejection heard in the other man’s voice and quickly got to his feet. He grabbed underneath Bane’s shaky arms and hoisted him up. Slowly, the two men made their way inside.

“What can I do?” Alec asked once they made it back into the living room.

Bane hung heavily from his side but managed to gesture lazily to the left. Alec navigated them to a double-door entrance at the end of the hallway, finding it led to the warlock’s bedroom. He quickly deposited him onto the bed.

Bane slumped forward where he was sat.

“My phone,” Bane muttered, jerking his head to the bedside table. When Alec picked it up to offer to him, he only shook his head.

“I-I can’t,” the warlock wheezed out as he clung tightly to the edge of the mattress with white, bloodless knuckles, trying to remain upright. “There’s a contact in my phone. Ragnor Fell. I need you to send hm a text. My wards…”

Alec kneeled beside the bed to do as he was asked, but he couldn’t unlock the phone. He glanced up to ask for the passcode only to finally notice how little energy Bane had left in him. His eyelids drooped languidly, sweat dripped from his skin, and he still shook. He looked moments away from passing out.

Though Alec had little experience with warlocks, he could tell that the one in front of him had truly depleted his very last ounce of magic, and he had done it saving him.

Alec quickly grabbed the warlock’s hand and swiped his finger across the phone to unlock it.

Bane was too busy focusing on remembering to breathe to be surprised at the other man’s touch.

“Is Ragnor another warlock?” Alec asked, trying to keep Bane awake. He quickly made his way into the contacts list and found the phone number. He saw Bane nod minutely from the corner of his eye.

“Wards aren’t stable … anymore. Ragnor can help.”

Alec typed the message quickly, telling Ragnor his help was needed to fortify wards for the High Warlock of Brooklyn. He got to his feet and set the phone down. “Message sent,” he confirmed.

“Y-you’re bleeding,” Bane mumbled thickly.

Alec followed his eyes down to his thigh, seeing the torn fabric and a bleeding gash peeking out from underneath it. “It’s nothing at all,” he answered, despite becoming aware of how the blood had soaked through a significant portion of his pants. He produced his stele and activated the Iratze rune to begin healing.

Bane fell back on to his bed as if he had finally lost the ability to sit upright. He inched further until his whole body made it onto the mattress.

“Do you need something? Can I get you water?”

“Just leave me,” Bane answered curtly.

“Are you sure?” Alec received no response and so turned to leave. The incensed tone amid the warlock’s exhaustion had caught him off guard.

As he reached the door, Bane managed to pull his face out from a pillow to stare at him. “You don’t belong here, Shadowhunter” he uttered with the last of his strength, the words full of vitriol.

\--

It was somewhere between dawn and sunrise, but Alec wasn’t sure of the exact time. He stood outside on the balcony, staring up at the still dark sky covering the city that sprawled out beneath it. He wondered when this Ragnor Fell person would show up. He dared not sleep until the wards could be stabilized.

He startled at a shuffling sound he heard come from behind him.

“Good morning, Alexander.”

Alec heard a surprisingly warm voice hum the greeting. He glanced over his shoulder warily to find Bane approaching him.

The warlock had changed; he was dressed in a bright blue, silky robe and matching pajama bottoms. His face was free from makeup, and his hair appeared softer, even though the spikes still splayed out in different directions. The blue robe billowed with the breeze as he made his way beside Alec.

A deep v-shaped swath of caramel-colored skin, exposed by the robe’s parted fabric, popped into Alec’s view. He flashed his eyes away from the sight, feeling an immediate heat rise through his cheeks up to the tips of ears. “Good morning, Bane.”

“Do call me Magnus,” the mage requested with a smirk so bright his whole face lit up; even his eyes crinkled with mirth.

Alec tilted his head at the peculiar request. “Magnus?”

“Yes, that is my name, after all.” Another smile.

“Since when?” Alec’s eyebrows furrowed in disbelief. He hadn’t once seen Bane smile in the handful of hours they’d known each other, but here the grin seemed set in place, and it was sublime.

“Since I gave it to myself many centuries ago, young Shadowhunter. This world may know me as Bane, but I am _Magnus_ Bane. And, I wish for you call me by my first name.”

“Um, okay … Magnus, sure...”

“It looks like I haven’t missed the sunrise. Splendid.” A relaxed sigh exuded from the warlock’s parted lips. He turned to lean against the railing. His contented gaze settled in, observing the quiet city below, the streets painted with grays and blacks of night and tinges of peach from the orange streetlights still glowing.

“Are you … all right?” Alec ventured, still gaping at him.

“More than all right, Alexander,” he answered warmly, rubbing his hands together almost giddily. A playful expression spread across his features. "I feel ... free."

“Look, Bane. I don’t know what’s going on here.”

“It’s Magnus,” the mage gently corrected him a second time.

Bane – or Magnus, as he now wished to be called - was in an uncharacteristically jovial mood, and the suddenly gentle tone of voice and request for Alec to call him by his first name seemed too far out of place to make much sense.

He took the opportunity to stare at the man next to him more closely without worry of being snapped at, silently scrutinizing every detail. He wouldn’t admit it out loud to anyone – not even his sister, Izzy – but Alec had been attracted to the warlock’s aesthetic features since he first saw him wrangling shax demons last night. 

“Are you startled by me, pretty boy?” Magnus asked with a pleasant lilt to his voice, breaking the silence as he looked over to Alec.

Perhaps Bane had managed a concussion from the rooftop skirmish earlier. _Yes_ , Alec determined; _that must be it_. “I think you hit your head.”

Magnus laughed enthusiastically in response, causing Alec to suck in a breath of shock at the unexpected sound. The sound stirred up a magnificently warm sensation in Alec’s chest.

“No, that’s not the case.”

“Then what happened? What’s changed?”

Magnus’ stare grew more intense, looking back and forth between Alec’s eyes as if trying to find the answer there. “I’m not sure exactly. I think … you.”

“Me? What about me?”

“ _You_ happened... You’ve unlocked something in me.”

Alec’s forehead creased; he was more than perplexed by the ambiguous response.

The two men fell into a comfortable silence and simply continued staring at each other.

Alec observed each detail of the warlock’s face, searching for clues to explain the sudden change. Without makeup, he appeared considerably younger. His features were no longer guarded. His dark eyes were rounded and soft in their gaze.

Despite the striking differences in his face and demeanor, though, Alec knew it was still the very same man standing before him.

For the first time since he arrived on the balcony, Magnus frowned.

Alec noticed. The act of the warlock losing his smile pulled Alec himself from reverie. “Magnus,” he uttered the name for the first time, happy to see when it made the corner of the other man’s lip curl up again.

“It appears I won’t be able to watch the sunrise with you as I’d hoped.” His eyes shifted to the side, as if seeing or hearing something that wasn't there.

“Why not?” Alec asked. He had not even realized they were going to watch it in the first place, but somehow, he still felt disappointed by Magnus’ declaration.

“I must return.”

“Where?”

“To bed of course,” Magnus smirked as though he had said something funny.

“Oh. Um, yeah of course. You must still be tired... Thank you, by the way, for what you did on the roof.”

Magnus began to retreat from the balcony. Before disappearing, he turned. “Don’t be frightened of me, Alexander. Just remember, I am the one who is frightened of you.” His voice was playful even though the words were serious.

Another warlock riddle Alec couldn’t decipher.

“Good night, Shadowhunter. We’ll talk more soon.”

Magnus disappeared into the loft, and Alec was left to wonder what the hell just happened.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments fuel the soul, so please let me know what you think of this story so far if you have a quick moment - thank you!


	3. Some Light is Shed

Alec sighed on the balcony and activated his stamina rune. The morning sun shone brightly, Magnus was still resting in his room, and Ragnor Fell had yet to arrive. Alec decided to make coffee since he couldn’t go to sleep with the wards still damaged.

As the coffee percolated, he noticed a hand-written note on the kitchen island counter. The words covered the paper in a fancy, looping script. It was addressed to “My dear little cabbage”.

Noting the nickname as odd but not wanting to invade privacy, he set the piece of paper back down without reading it and went back to his thoughts. The warlock’s mood swing from closed off and angry to relaxed and gentle still surprised Alec; he was as intrigued as he was confused.

It was just after the coffee pot finished perking that he heard the front doors open. Instantly, Alec’s hand went to his bow before an older, horned warlock emerged from the entryway.

“Easy there. What is a Shadowhunter doing in my friend’s lair?”

“Who are you?” Alec tested.

“Ragnor Fell, in the flesh. Now answer _my_ question, lad.” Ragnor ignored the arrow aimed at his head. He seemed busy trying to sense out the wards, his hands floating in front of a nearby wall.

“I’ve been assigned by the New York Institute as security detail for the High Warlock of Brooklyn until the matter of his magic depletion can be resolved.” Alec reported and lowered his bow.

Ragnor frowned as he looked around to examine the invisible magic curtained around the premises. “He wasn’t kidding. The state of these wards is rubbish. They all need to be replenished… And where is our high warlock this morning?”

“He’s still sleeping. We were attacked here last night. Croucher demons penetrated the wards. Magnus used the last of his magic fighting them and … pulling me from a fall.”

The warlock’s head snapped to attention. He closed the distance between them and moved to stand in front of Alec. “What did you just say?”

Alec looked confused. “The wards failed last night--” he began again.

“No!” Ragnor waived his hand impatiently. “What was it you just called him?”

“Magnus.”

Ragnor stared harshly into Alec’s eyes as if trying to decipher something. “Where did you hear that?”

“Um, from him?” Alec answered, unsure if it was a trick question. “He told me that was his first name.”

Ragnor’s lips parted in surprise. A small glint appeared in his eyes. “He _told_ you?” Ragnor parroted with a short laugh.

“Yeah. Last night, he asked me to call him Magnus.”

Ragnor laughed again, harder this time. A relieved tilt to it. “Well, well, well. This is quite a development.” He sounded fascinated.

“What do you mean?”

“I haven’t … I haven’t spoken to my dear friend Magnus in a hundred years.”

“I’m not sure I understand. Your name is programmed into his cell phone,” Alec explained matter-of-factly.

“Yes, and what does that have to do with anything?”

Alec glared with confusion and annoyance. “He’s your friend, but you haven’t spoken in an actual century, and yet he has your cell phone number?”

“That’s right. It’s not as if he’s been available. Bane’s made that quite difficult.”

Alec sighed in exasperation, turning to pour himself a cup of coffee. “Would you like some? I definitely need a cup. Now.”

“No, thank you, Shadowhunter. What is your name?” Ragnor asked, before catching sight of the letter on the counter.

“My name is Alec. Look, I don’t know what’s going on, but his wards…” Alec trailed off as he caught sight of Ragnor holding the note in his hands. 

“My dear little cabbage….” Ragnor’s voice quivered as he read it out loud. “Oh, sweet Magnus, you really did come back.” He sniffed a tear away and quickly read the note.

_… Thank you for coming. Though I fear I may not be here when you arrive. I need your help, dear friend. Get ~~him~~ me to trust Alec. This Shadowhunter… I don’t know how, but I think he is part of the reason I’m here. ~ Magnus_

“Ragnor, thank you for coming,” a tired voice sounded from across the loft, startling both the warlock and the Shadowhunter. 

Alec noticed Ragnor quickly folding the note away and shoving it into his vest pocket just before the other warlock came to stand in the kitchen with them.

“I see you met my _bodyguard_.”

“Good morning, Magnus,” Alec greeted, only to see the man’s face fall in shock.

“I know you’re still new here, but it’s Bane.” He glared first at Alec and then to Ragnor with accusatory eyes.

Ragnor glanced at Alec, who sipped at his black coffee, eyes wide in confusion. Of course, this must have been like whiplash for him. He saw the Shadowhunter lower his mug and open his mouth to speak, but Ragnor jumped in before he could question anything. “Young lad, why don’t you step out for a bit?”

“I shouldn’t leave,” Alec replied hesitantly, stepping out of the way as ~~Magnus~~ Bane moved to pour himself a cup of coffee. 

“Nonsense. I’m here for now,” Ragnor insisted. “Take leave for a little while. I’m sure your time spent with our dear friend Bane has been… quite the endeavor.” He smirked at the eyeroll he received from the other warlock for his remark.

Alec ran this hand through his hair uncertainly but nodded, observant enough to know Ragnor wanted to speak to Bane alone. “I’m going to check on my siblings back at the Institute and grab something to eat. I’ll be back soon.”

“No rush,” Bane offered in lieu of a goodbye, pouring an obscene amount of cream into his mug.

Alec shook his head as he set his own cup down and left the apartment, still bewildered and now more than a little concerned that the high warlock had gone mad. _Who would go by two names and insist others call them by one or the other depending on which one matched their mood?_

Ragnor glowered at Bane after the front door closed. “Why must you insist on being so unapproachable?”

“And yet, here you are. And, I haven’t scared the Shadowhunter off yet either so spare me your lecture. I can’t help it if his proximity to me gives me a headache.”

“Oh, don’t be so dramatic,” Ragnor scolded. “Now really, how are you doing? You don’t look well.”

“I’m fabulous,” Bane replied sarcastically. Though, he lost his dry humor and immediately tensed as soon as Ragnor’s hand came to rest on his shoulder.

Ragnor felt his friend stiffen at his touch. He mournfully released his grasp and took a step back to give him space.

Bane quickly forced down the remorse that bubbled up from his reaction to a simple touch and changed topics. “Alec called me Magnus. He could only know about that from you. I’d appreciate you keeping stories to yourself. You know I’m Bane to the Shadow World now.”

“Yes, of course, my obstinate friend,” Ragnor played along. So, Bane wasn’t aware that Magnus had made an appearance last night.

“He’s a Lightwood, you know. I don’t need that family in my business any more than they already are.”

“The lad seems trustworthy for a Shadowhunter. It comforts me to know you have him here right now. Demons attacked here last night? Your message last night did not come across as urgent as it should have.”

Bane sighed and rubbed his temples as he strode out of the kitchen. “Yes, I’m sorry. I didn’t want to worry you. Thank you again for coming.”

“I will set to work on replenishing these wards right away. It will take me some time, but then we can catch up.”

Bane nodded and made his way to the couch with a rather large spell book. He had done extensive research in the last week but still couldn’t solve the mystery of his depleted magic. None of the warlocks he had spoken with had heard of an occurrence as such had happened to him; everything so far had led to a dead end.

He steadied himself as he sat down to read, carefully controlling his thoughts to focus on nothing more than the book in his hands.

\--

When Alec returned to the institute, Izzy quickly bombarded him. She wanted to know how spending the night with the High Warlock of Brooklyn had gone, but he couldn’t verbalize his first impression of the warlock.

Alec had not been around warlocks much before. Perhaps they all suffered side effects in those rare occasions where their magic was depleted and that could explain the odd behavior. He didn’t know how else to explain the mood swing he witnessed in the pre-dawn exchange on the balcony. He didn’t want to worry Izzy so he couldn’t talk about the demon attack.

“There’s nothing much to say,” Alec decided on.

Izzy huffed, disappointed. “Alec, give me something.”

He shrugged but tried again. “Nothing really happened, Izzy. His magic is really off. Another warlock, Ragnor Fell, is with him now. He’s re-fortifying the wards to his loft.”

“We haven’t detected any fluctuation in Bane’s wards _here_ at the Institute. That’s strange.”

“Maybe Ragnor should still inspect them. To be safe,” he suggested as he started to lead her down the hallway to the cafeteria. “Now let’s go; I’m starving.” He was determined not to miss pancake day.

\--

When Ragnor finished with the apartment’s wards, he made his way back to the living room to find the younger warlock nodding off to sleep on the couch. His heart lurched in fondness for his long-time friend. He took the book that was falling off his lap, which caused Bane to stir.

“What are you doing?” he asked suspiciously before he regained his bearings.

“I’m finished with your wards, and you should go to bed. You need rest.”

“I-I need to figure out what’s wrong with me. That’s what I need,” he snapped, rubbing his eyes.

“And you will. I will help. But for now, you need to replenish the magic you do have. Do you fancy some tea?”

Bane sighed. “Tea won’t help. Sleep won’t help.” 

“I insist, my dear.”

Bane rolled his eyes but bit his tongue. Instead of arguing further, he stood up and retreated to his bedroom silently, his shoulders sunken with dejection. Ragnor wanted to tease him for his petulant mannerisms, but teasing was too much like old times, times that _this_ version of Magnus had buried long ago.

By the time Ragnor entered the bedroom with a cup of chamomile tea, Bane was already asleep. With a soft sigh, he set the tea beside the bed, casting a small spell to keep the liquid hot until the other warlock was ready to drink it.

“You know,” Ragnor whispered to the sleeping man before him, “you’re not as dark as you want everyone to believe. Even as you are now. One day soon, I think you’ll figure that out.”

\--

Alec returned to the loft and was startled when the front door opened before he could knock on it. He spotted Ragnor on the couch. “Didn’t you fix the wards?” Alec questioned as he made his way further into the apartment.

“Don’t be daft. Of course, I did. They’re built to recognize you. You may enter at any time while you are here to protect Magnus.”

“So, it’s Magnus again?”

“What?”

“What should I call him? Bane or Magnus?”

“I guess it depends on who you’re talking to.”

“I don’t know if warlocks are always so obscure and full of riddles, but I’m lost here.”

Ragnor didn’t respond immediately. Instead, he took a moment to quell his irritation. He knew it was wrong to expect the young Shadowhunter to understand what was happening.

“Sit, please.”

Alec obliged, coming to rest on the same blue chair he had last night.

“Look, I trust you because he trusts you.”

“Bane told you that?” Alec questioned, incredulous.

“No, but Magnus did - in that note he left me.”

Alec scoffed; it began to almost feel like he was having a conversation with a Seelie. “They _are_ the same person, right?” He had been sure they were, but now he was starting to doubt.

Ragnor nodded. “Yes, but not in the way you’d think.”

“I need you to explain it to me then.”

“This isn’t my place,” Ragnor continued, “but there is something you need to know if you are to adequately protect him until his magic returns to normal. You cannot share this information with anyone else. _Anyone_.”

“Go on,” Alec urged, but Ragnor still seemed hesitant.

“Am I right to trust you? Are you loyal to your word?”

“I am. My duty is to protect Ba- Magnus. I’ll keep whatever it is you tell me private.”

Ragnor nodded and sipped at his tea, wondering where to begin. “Right. Well, simply put, Magnus and Bane are indeed the same person. What you witnessed are not simply mood swings, though.”

Alec stared intently. “What are they then?”

“Memories can be a most horrendous source of torture. We cope with them in different ways, especially warlocks who endure for centuries. Magnus, that clever bugger, found a rather creative approach to dealing with his own darkness.”

“How?”

“A little over a hundred years ago, something happened to Magnus – exactly what is not my story to share, but what’s important is that it broke him in a way that would have destroyed most other warlocks. You have only just met him, Alec, and at a point where his power has forsaken him. But make no mistake, Magnus Bane is one of the most potent warlocks this world has ever seen. And because of it, he found a way to survive when lesser warlocks would have given in and calcified.”

Alec absorbed the information, filled with a sense of awe.

“Magnus is also wickedly smart. He invented the portal, for heaven’s sake. Sometimes, he’s too smart for his own good, though…” Ragnor narrowed his eyes and stared out at nothing at all. “I still don’t know how he did it, but he found a way to control his feelings like a light switch. The problem is that the switch is broken. He can’t access them, and they are all repressed.”

“I’m not sure I follow.”

“He designed himself, this version of himself, to be alone. If he has nothing to lose, he has nothing to fear – no pain to feel. Bane is not who my dear friend is. It’s who he thinks he needs to be to survive.”

“Last night when he asked me to call him Magnus. He was so different. He was … happy.”

Ragnor smiled wistfully. “I’m jealous you got to see that, actually. I haven’t seen my friend happy in all this time. Since he started to go by Bane and closed himself off to all emotions.”

“I still don’t understand.”

“Alec, I guess it’s easiest to consider Bane and Magnus as two different people. At least, in his mind, they are. And Bane doesn’t realize Magnus has reappeared. He thinks I told you about him and that’s why you called him by his first name.”

A lone thought snapped out of Alec’s subconscious, landing on the tip of his tongue as all the puzzle pieces he had been given clicked into place. “So, he has a split personality?” he questioned in a hushed voice.

“Something like that, it seems. Magnus has kept his emotions under lock and key for so long now, that I thought his true essence had disappeared long ago. I thought this angry, arcane side of him was all that remained. Until this morning…”

“That’s what you meant when you hadn’t spoken with Magnus in a hundred years?”

Ragnor closed his eyes for a moment to blink away the sorrow in his expression before he continued. “I don’t understand how or why, but the side of him that he bottled up a century ago, along with his first name, has just emerged for the first time and you were the only one to witness it.”

“That makes no sense. I didn’t do anything. I just met Bane last night. I’m nothing to him.”

“Regardless, I need you to see this through. Protect him from harm. Don’t be deterred by his dispiteous tendencies. It’s nothing but a coping mechanism. Magnus despises letting anyone know he cares, so he goes out of his way to make one feel like he cares about nothing at all.”

Alec gave a perfunctory nod. The thought of abandoning his duty to the warlock had never crossed his mind. “Ragnor, are you able to check on Magnus’ wards at the institute? They’re still strong, but I want to be sure that nothing’s amiss after what happened here.”

Ragnor nodded. “Yes, I had already planned on stopping there before I returned home.”

“Good. My sister, Isabelle, is expecting you. Don’t seek out Robert; I’d rather not call Magnus’ wards into doubt.”

Ragnor’s eyes gleaned with a small sparkle of surprise as he stood up. He recognized that Alec’s intent was to protect Magnus’ reputation, and the thought comforted him.

Alec stood and followed to the door.

“I will return to my home in London after meeting your sister, but I want you to have my phone number in case you need to reach me. I have some research to do if I am to help figure out what’s gone awry with Magnus’ magic. I fear there’s greater demon activity at play.”

Alec took down Ragnor’s number.

“Here, save this number too. Catarina Loss is a warlock who lives in the New York area and is another close friend of Magnus’. I will ask her to visit soon with some potions for you to have on hand. They will be helpful when his magic is depleted.”

Alec nodded again, thankful for Ragnor’s guidance.

“Oh, and one more thing, Alec. Since it appears that he doesn’t realize his alter-ego has surfaced … I think it’s best not to bring it up to him. If he were to know of the sudden return, it would unsettle him. And, I don’t want to afford him the opportunity to rebury that part of himself.”

“I think I understand,” Alec answered, but he was betrayed by an uncertain crack in his voice.

“Just know that either way, he _is_ Magnus. Even if he asks you to call him Bane. There’s still light in him, Alec. He just refuses to let himself feel any of it.”

With that, the horned warlock portaled away and left Alec by himself in the silent apartment.


	4. Pandemonium

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bane makes an appearance at Pandemonium despite Alec's concerns.

Alec was in the last place he expected to find himself: a Downworlder night club.

He watched the crowded scene in Pan _demon_ ium from the balcony of the club’s VIP section on the second floor. Downworlders and mundanes alike were bouncing chaotically on the dance floor, mashed together. Electronic dance music pounded. Smoke curled around in the air, illuminated by the pulsing blue and green strobe lights. 

Alec had only been to the club a handful of times and only ever while on duty to dispatch of wandering demons who bothered the mundanes. He had never been upstairs to the lounge, which he guessed to be Bane’s usual spot. Even up and away from the riot of the dance floor, Alec found the scene too noisy, too hazy, and too intrusive. No, the club scene did not appeal to him. At all.

He turned around to watch Bane interact with the other Downworlders. Against Alec’s cautious advice, the warlock had insisted on visiting Pandemonium as a show of normalcy. In the end, Alec begrudgingly conceded. It made sense to keep up appearances so as not to raise suspicion of something wrong.

Bane sat in a tufted velvet club chair that was regal enough to serve as a throne. For as awkward as Alec was in social spaces like this, Bane looked like he truly belonged there. Even through the smoke and dim lighting, Alec made out the dark kohl-lined eyes, sharply clenched jaw, and those never-smiling lips. Alec walked closer without thinking, and before he knew better, he was sitting down in a much less ornate lounge chair beside him.

Bane’s gaze flickered to watch Alec sit before resuming his confident indifference. He casually scanned the lounge floor in front of their sitting area.

“Have you finished uh, making an appearance yet?” Alec asked, eager to move Bane away from the crowded space. If someone was truly targeting him, a place like Pandemonium was not where they should be.

“This isn’t your scene I take it,” Bane said, disinterested in Alec’s concern. He was still looking around the room when Alec leaned closer.

“I just don’t like being in a situation that leaves you exposed.”

Bane reacted strangely. His eyes widened in surprise at the same time his nostrils flared in anger. Not even a second passed before his icy, unconcerned expression slipped back into place.

“Yes. Well, it’s a good thing I have a trusty Shadowhunter at my side then. Isn’t it?”

Alec sat back with a sigh, knowing they were unlikely to leave anytime soon. A couple of Seelies glided over, both holding a drink in each of their hands.

“It’s a tantalizing evening when the High Warlock is in our company. We haven’t seen you around much lately, Bane,” the male Seelie said.

“What can I say, Downworlder affairs keep me busy.”

Bane's lips curled into a smug smirk, clearly meant as a discreet _‘I told you so’_ to Alec about the importance of keeping up his appearances. Of course, Bane had been right. Withdrawing from the Downworld to hide while trying to solve the issue of his weakened magic would be noticed. Even though it was true, Alec still didn’t like it.

The Seelies settled into the couch at Bane’s other side. Alec recognized the female as Kaelie, one of many girls Jace had been with.

“Share a drink with us, Bane. This,” she said as she offered one of the glasses, “is called an Old Fashioned I just learned.”

Bane took the glass and clinked it against hers before drinking it down in one long swallow. The male Seelie offered one to Alec, who waved his hand to decline.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t like one?”

“No, thanks.” Alec shook his head firmly. The Seelie shrugged and sipped at it himself. 

Bane set the empty drink down on the glass table in front of them. “Alec here is on official duty. There’s been an increase in demon sightings in the area. Naturally, there will be an increase in Shadowhunter presence. I don’t want trouble for my patrons.”

“So that’s why Jace is here,” Kaelie said, her fingers running up and down the other Seelie’s bare arm.

“Jace is here?” Alec asked.

Kaelie nodded. “I thought he might be looking for a good time, but he declined my offer.”

Alec stood and walked back over to the balcony. He immediately noticed Jace at the edge of the dance floor, standing stoically, arms crossed over his chest as he scanned the crowd. Within seconds, the blonde man looked up and made eye contact, grinning at his parabatai in surprise. Then Alec noticed Izzy effortlessly making her way through the throngs of people.

Alec knew they were on patrol, which meant they likely tracked something into the club. Instinctively, he turned back and rejoined the warlock, who was being flirted with by the Seelie couple.

“We’d be interested in a night with you, warlock. What do you say? Are you in the mood for a threesome?” 

Alec cringed, a curiously bitter heat pricking about in his chest. He swallowed the sensation away obediently. The duty assigned to him was simple: Protect the High Warlock. Nothing more, nothing less.

“Bane, there’s a matter that requires your attention,” Alec interrupted. Bane ignored the vague statement.

“Don’t leave,” Kaelie said. “We’d even let this Shadowhunter come and watch if that’s something you’re into.”

Before either could answer, a man with a dark brown-haired ponytail and beady eyes joined their group, coming to stand in front of Bane. He had strolled over from a crowd of warlocks. “What a nice surprise, Bane. I didn’t see you there,” he said, voice raised above the loud beating music around them.

“Lorenzo,” Bane said through gritted teeth.

“I figured I’d drop in tonight to remind our fellow warlocks of my gathering this weekend,” the other warlock said. 

“Ah yes, one of your infamous parties. Must be sure your guests show up,” Bane drawled. “Alec, this is Lorenzo Rey, one of our New York warlocks.”

Lorenzo and Alec nodded at each other. They didn’t have time for this. Alec needed to get Bane out of the club if his siblings were truly tracking demons downstairs.

Lorenzo stuck his chest out, undeterred by Bane’s less-than cheery greeting. “Well, Alec. I applaud our fearless leader here for working to strengthen the relationship between Downworlders and Shadowhunters.”

Alec noticed Bane roll his eyes off to the side as Lorenzo continued.

“I’d like to follow suit. Though you may not be comfortable there, you’re welcome to attend my party. My events are the most lavish in Brooklyn, I’ll have you know.”

Alec nodded again, impatient. Thankfully, Lorenzo’s attention soon strayed somewhere behind them. “Oh, and there’s Dorothea. I haven’t spoken to her tonight. I guess I’ll see you both soon enough then. Have a lovely evening.” Lorenzo wandered off, leaving Alec and Bane alone with the two Seelies again.

Alec watched Bane exhale and sag down in his seat, propping his head up in his hand as if it were suddenly too heavy to support otherwise. 

Though part of his face was covered with ring-laden fingers, Alec still noticed Bane’s dark expression had faded to a dull stare. His weary demeanor reminded Alec of when Bane had depleted his magic. The only problem was that they had not been involved in any physical battle; they had merely sat in the club for the last hour.

Alec moved quickly. “Bane, can I speak with you privately?”

The warlock blinked at the sound of his name; his eyebrows furrowed at Alec’s request. When Alec gestured for Bane to stand up, he waved him away with his free hand and closed his eyes.

A voice came from behind him. “Alec.”

He spun around at the sound of his name to find Izzy standing there. “You need to get Bane out of here. We followed a group of shape-shifting demons into the club.”

Alec hushed his sister, not wanting others privy to their conversation. “Do you have things under control?”

“Don’t worry, big brother. We have a full team. Now go.” 

Alec didn’t wait any longer. He turned around and grabbed Bane’s arm at the bicep, pulling him up to his feet roughly. Bane’s vision cleared enough to glare at him.

Kaelie groaned. The male Seelie stood; Alec still hadn’t learned his name. “Don’t spoil the evening, Shadowhunter.”

Bane regained his senses enough to brush the Seelies off. “Your offer is tempting, but Alec is right. I have some business to attend to.”

Alec started to lead him to the stairs.

Bane wrenched his arm out of Alec’s grip and straightened his jacket. “No. This way.”

They made their way to a door that sat hidden in a darkened, empty corner. Bane pushed it open just as a loud shriek came from the club behind him. One of the demons must have shifted into their true form; the fight had begun.

The floor rumbled as people started scrambling to the stairs in a full-on stampede.

Alec considered pushing Bane through the door to safety and turning back to help his siblings. He looked over his shoulder at the sound of a whip cracking. Izzy’s whip. It wrapped around a scathing demon’s neck. With an effortless tug, Izzy effectively snuffed the creature into oblivion before turning to Alec.

“Go!” Her voice was filled with exasperation.

Something heavy pulled at his side. He looked over to see a disoriented Bane sliding to the floor on buckling knees. “No you don’t,” Alec said, wrapping his arm around the other man’s chest to pull him back up to his feet. Without looking back, he pushed them both through the door.

They tumbled into a long hallway with black walls and dark purple carpet. The door slammed shut behind them. “Are there stairs or a fire escape back here?”

“Better,” Bane said as he sucked in gulps of air. “An elevator. The end of the hall.”

“What’s wrong with you?” Alec rearranged his hold around the warlock to pull him up into a standing position.

“I’m … I … nothing is wrong.”

“You are definitely not okay if you can’t stand on your own. What happened, Bane? You were fine three minutes ago.”

Bane placed a hand against the wall to steady himself, but it didn’t help. His legs wobbled like jelly. He rolled his back against the wall only to feel himself begin to slide down again. He grunted in frustration.

“Yeah, something’s definitely wrong,” Alec said.

“The Seelies’ drink,” Bane wondered out loud. Beads of sweat had started to form along his forehead. He swallowed, his mouth dry from panting for breath. 

“Damnit.” Alec punched the wall with one hand while he held the warlock up with his other. Of course, it must have been the drink. How had Alec not questioned it?

“All right. It’s going to be okay. We just need to get out of here.” He looked intensely at Bane. Exhaustion clearly etched along the warlock’s features, but he was fighting to keep his eyes open. Though foggy, they still stared fiercely at the Shadowhunter. Standing so close, Alec could see the storm that lived inside Bane. Alec found it mesmerizing.

Bane noticed Alec’s intense gaze and the awe-struck look sprawling onto his face. It infuriated him enough to send a brief surge of energy through him. In a single instant, Bane growled while he grabbed Alec’s wrists. He pushed himself off the wall, flinging Alec against it instead.

“Don’t ever look at me like that again. Stay out of my head,” Bane snarled. Soon after, his grip loosened, and his face softened. “You won’t like what you see there.”

“Okay. Okay,” Alec said in a strangled whisper. “Bane, we just need to get out of here before someone sees you like this.”

“Why are you trying to save me?” Any newfound energy had been zapped from Bane’s body. His arms dropped heavily at his sides. He staggered back. “You should be running away from me, you stupid Nephilim.”

Bane turned to head further down the hall but after two steps, he lost all ability to stand and dropped to the floor in a crumpled heap, unconscious.

Alec swooped down beside him. “Bane, wake up.” He turned him over and tapped gently at his cheek, repeating the motion until he saw shining cat eyes blink open sluggishly.

“Bane, hey. Look at me. You need to stay awake just a little longer.”

The warlock’s fuzzy gaze moved from the ceiling down to Alec. When he noticed Alec hovering over him, a tiny smile crept across his lips.

“Alexanderr, what’s going onn?” he slurred.

Alec’s breath caught in his throat upon hearing the soft-spoken use of his full name.

“Magnus?”

The warlock managed a shaky nod. His weak smile grew a little wider before dropping into a confused frown. “Ssomething’s wrong… H-help me.” 

Before Alec could speak, Magnus’ entire face fell slack, and his head lolled back in Alec’s hands. Behind the door, sounds of battle grew louder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, what do you think so far? Looks like Magnus will make a reappearance. What's happening to Bane? I truly appreciate your feedback and comments!


	5. A Different Perspective

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec meets Catarina. Magnus returns.

It was late into the night when Catarina Loss heard her phone ring. A name flashed across the screen: Alec Lightwood. Ragnor had instructed her to add it to her contacts. She answered it quickly.

“Alec?”

A beat of silence followed. The Shadowhunter likely was startled upon hearing his name.

“Ragnor gave me your number. That’s how I know who you are. Is something wrong with Magnus?”

“Um, yeah- yes. Ragnor said you’re a friend that could help… I-I don’t know how bad it is.”

Within a single minute, Catarina wrapped herself in a sweater, grabbed a bag of supplies, and portaled to Pandemonium, knowing the exact hallway Alec had just described to her.

As soon as she arrived, she saw the young Shadowhunter sitting on the floor, cradling her unmoving friend in his arms. 

Alec looked up at her with concerned eyes as she noticed muffled shouts coming from the club behind the door.

“What’s going on out there?” she asked before kneeling to get a better look at Magnus.

“Ravener demons.”

“You think they’re here for Magnus?”

“I don’t know. There’s a Shadowhunter team here, though. They’re handling it. Can you take us back to Bane’s loft?”

Alec’s voice was controlled like Shadowhunters are trained to be. Though, she picked up on an unnatural tautness to it.

Catarina nodded and moved to action. Soft sparks spun around her outstretched arm until they swirled into the familiar mirror shape of a portal. She turned to see Alec had already stood up and was waiting behind her. Magnus hung limply over his shoulder. 

Catarina and Alec stepped into the portal, moving from one hallway into another; instantly, they were standing outside the penthouse loft. Alec immediately walked up to the door, which opened obediently in his presence. Catarina knew Ragnor had likely programmed the wards to recognize him, but it still unsettled her to see the doors to a warlock’s lair fall open for a Shadowhunter, especially since that lair belonged to Brooklyn's High Warlock. Alec must be different, Catarina thought, particularly if Ragnor somehow managed to trust him.

With a sigh, she pulled her bag further up on her shoulder and followed to the bedroom.

She watched Alec intently, stunned by the tenderness in which he attended to Magnus. He carefully deposited the unconscious warlock onto the bed, as if unloading the most precious of cargo. He hovered over him for several moments before Catarina made an attention-catching cough.

Alec snapped out of whatever trance he had fallen into and quickly stepped back, allowing Catarina space to examine him.

“Tell me what happened tonight,” Catarina instructed Alec as her arms stretched above her friend’s still form. Magic streamed from her fingertips forming blue tendrils of sparkling smoke.

“Bane needed to make an appearance at Pandemonium tonight. Everything was fine. A couple of Seelies offered him a drink. We think maybe they slipped him something. My brother and sister showed up on patrol, tracking those ravener demons you heard when you portaled over.”

Alec instinctively pulled his phone out to check for messages, but neither Izzy nor Jace had texted. A worried pit settled in his stomach.

“There’s no trace of Seelie magic,” Catarina said.

“Are you sure?”

Catarina scoffed. “Yes, I’m sure.”

“Then what happened to him?”

“It appears something _was_ in that drink or something else he ingested while he was there. But, it’s not comprised of any Seelie properties. Whoever gave it to him wasn’t trying to kill him with it either. It seems to be a weakening potion.”

“To weaken his magic?”

“Yes. It works to deplete energy in all forms. That’s why he’s asleep now.”

“So, it’s not poison?”

Catarina turned to face Alec and shook her head. She hid her surprise at the relieved expression his features softened into at such news. Did this Shadowhunter have invested interest in Magnus?

Alec’s eyes lit up in revelation. “Could what he was given tonight be responsible for his ongoing magic depletion? Maybe someone has been doing this for the last two weeks.”

“Perhaps. I can’t be sure. I wouldn’t really know because I didn’t know that was happening.”

Alec blanched at her harsh tone. “Bane didn’t tell you?”

“No. I learned what’s going on from Ragnor.”

Alec was not an overly social being, especially when it came to outside of his own family and the New York Shadowhunters. Even so, he easily recognized the unspoken hurt darting across Catarina’s face.

“No matter,” she said, brushing the sensation of betrayal away like it was a pesky fly. “I appreciate what you’re doing for Magnus.”

“You don’t call him Bane, I noticed.”

Catarina raised her head high, defiantly. “Absolutely not. Ragnor might play along, but I refuse to. Perhaps that’s why we haven’t been as close these past few decades.”

Alec didn’t know how to respond. He absent-mindedly shifted his weight from one side to side and folded his arms across his chest.

“I need to leave, but I brought some things that will help him.”

“You’re leaving? Will he be okay?”

“Yes, I’m leaving. And yes, he will be okay. I told you. He is merely asleep.” Catarina picked her bag up from the end of the bed and walked over to the vanity table. Immediately she began pulling bottle after bottle from the bag as Alec watched.

“I assume he will know what to do with all this?” Alec asked as he waved his hand over the growing collection of small vials and various-sized bottles.

“For the most part, yes. Magnus may be one of the most powerful warlocks, but he is not as good a healer as I am. These are my best creations.”

Alec caught a tone of pride in her voice. She briefly explained the potions to him. Without detailing the ingredients, she described the contents in a professional manner that was easy to understand for someone who knew nothing about magic – as if a doctor might explain a complicated diagnosis to a patient.

He quickly got the gist of each bottle’s purpose. The blue ones were healing agents to various degrees. The green vials were magic recovery aids. The purple ones were sleeping potions. There was a black tin that contained a balm to speed the healing of flesh wounds. Without Bane’s magic functioning fully, Alec felt relieved to have the potions on hand. They were a comfort. “Thank you, Catarina.”

Catarina nodded as a soft smile formed on her lips from the Shadowhunter’s sincere tone.

\--

Alec spent the rest of the evening pacing around the loft by himself. Catarina had left hours ago. Izzy’s text earlier assured him that she and Jace were fine after the demon fight at Pandemonium. Calmness from his parabatai rune further eased his mind. Tomorrow, he would ask Jace to investigate Kaelie. Even if Catarina confirmed Seelie magic wasn’t used, he needed to find out where that drink came from, and if it was the source of Bane’s collapse in the club.

With nothing else to do, he fell asleep on the couch for a few hours but woke up well before sunrise. The loft was still silent, and so was its owner; Alec felt drawn to check on him. The temperature in the bedroom seemed cooler than earlier. Shining moonlight spilled onto the floor through the windows. Magnus lay in the middle of the bed, unmoving.

Alec wanted to call out and alert the warlock to his presence but stumbled over which name to use, deciding against using one at all. He edged closer and spoke quietly in the dimness. “I just came in to check on you. Do you need anything?”

Magnus remained motionless. Alec heard the warlock’s heavy, rhythmic breathing and promptly determined he was still asleep.

Alec didn’t want to wake him, but he didn’t want to leave either. The internal pull to stay close unnerved him, but he chose not to fight it. Instead, he settled into the armchair in front of the bedroom window. 

Another hour passed before Alec heard the other man stir. Alec tensed as the sheets rustled, wondering if it was Magnus or Bane who was groaning their way back to wakefulness.

“It’s too dark,” the warlock mumbled hoarsely. Alec strode over to the nightstand and clicked on a lamp. He looked down to see bright cat eyes piercing through fuzzy grogginess. Those eyes softened, and when Alec saw lips curl fondly at him, he knew. It was Magnus there in front of him.

“Alexander.” The pained wince Magnus gave after speaking made snap Alec into action.

“If it’s okay, let me help you up so you can drink some water.” He tentatively grasped at Magnus’ shoulders, lifting him forward and throwing a pillow behind his back to rest on.

Magnus did not shy away from his touch. In fact, he melted from it, becoming almost boneless in Alec’s grasp. 

As soon as Magnus grabbed onto Alec’s forearms to help steady himself, Alec sucked in a startled gulp of air. The innocent touch felt so strange, like being shocked, but in a way that made Alec’s body sing. He shook the quickly-forming confusion away, though, focusing instead on getting Magnus to drink the water, which turned out to be quite easy. The warlock gulped it down so eagerly that he drained the entire glass at once and had to pant to catch his breath after. 

“A man could get used to this type of treatment,” Magnus said as Alec took the empty glass and placed it back on the nightstand.

“How do you feel?”

“Like I have slept a hundred years but am still exhausted.” His words were serious, but Magnus kept the tone surprisingly light. “But you, pretty boy, are surely a sight for my sore eyes.”

Before he could stop it, a genuinely pleased smile sprung onto Alec’s face. He allowed himself just a moment to stare, mesmerized by the weary warlock batting sleepy eyes up at him. Just for a moment. Or, maybe it was more than a moment. Time suddenly became trivial to him. 

He watched Magnus’ smile widen. Something about the sweetness it exuded made Alec’s resolve crumble. Yes, Magnus' stare was sweet but also dangerous. It was something Alec feared he could become addicted to. Before his soul could catch on fire any further, Alec shook his head to clear all the thoughts away.

“You’ve been asleep most of the night. Catarina said the drink didn’t have Seelie magic. And it wasn’t meant to kill you. What do you think about that?”

“Drink?”

“Yeah, last night at Pandemonium?”

Magnus stared blankly.

“What do you remember?”

“Not much, I’m afraid. We were in a hallway.”

“Right,” Alec said, mostly to himself. “It wasn’t you.”

Magnus cringed, obligated to at least try explaining. Though, it was something he barely understood himself. “It was me. I mean, it’s me, but I don’t know what happens when I’m…..” His mouth opened and closed, forming the beginning of words, but nothing felt right.

“When you’re Bane?” Alec offered simply. Magnus nodded.

“Yes. When I’m _Bane_ ,” Magnus said, using air quotes as he spoke his surname.

“Wait. Then how did you know who I was that first night we met on the balcony?”

“I don’t know that either. When I first saw you, I just … _knew_ you.”

“You knew me?” Alec asked. Magnus nodded. Alec didn’t understand it; he had an even harder time believing it. Still, he could relate to the feeling on some level.

The more time he spent with the warlock, the more drawn to him Alec became. Whether Bane or Magnus stood before him, every minute had felt to Alec much more like remembering someone than learning about a stranger. Even if it made absolutely no sense.

The sun was starting to rise. Magnus yawned in the early dawning light. Alec reached for a green vial and shook it. “Catarina instructed me to give you this when you woke up.”

Magnus took the vial in his hand, creasing his forehead in confusion. “What’s it for?”

“To help you replenish your magic at an accelerated rate.”

Magnus only grew more uncertain. He set the vial down on the sheet that covered his lap. “There’s something wrong with my magic?” When he waved his hands, only spluttered flicks of faded blue fell, the sparks dying out in the air before they could reach anywhere. “Oh,” he said in the smallest voice Alec had ever heard.

Alec bit his lip, disturbed by the disheartened expression now shading the warlock’s features. He took the vial and put it back in Magnus’ hands, wrapping his fingers around the tube of green liquid. “This will help,” he encouraged as he uncapped the potion.

Magnus nodded and drank it down in a cheerless swallow. An awkward silence followed. Magnus was still so new to him, but Alec still recognized that he was beginning to close himself off. The thought panicked him.

“Catarina misses you,” Alec blurted out, not knowing what else to talk about but desperate to steer them from silence; he knew better than to ask the serious questions, the ones he wanted desperately to know.

Magnus stopped frowning, but he didn’t manage to muster a full smile either. “And I miss her. Please thank her for me, darling.”

“Why can’t you thank her yourself? She’ll be back.”

“I’m not sure I can be here when she comes back.”

Panic came crashing into Alec’s chest out of nowhere. Magnus couldn’t leave. The mere thought dismayed him more than it should. “Magnus, I don’t understand.”

“I don’t either.” Magnus regarded him with empathetic eyes.

“How do I help you stay here? Tell me what to do.”

“I don’t know, Alexander. I thought you might.”

Alec stared open-mouthed at such an assumption. He was utterly certain that a solution to the centuries-old warlock’s fractured psyche would not come from him, a young Shadowhunter with literally no experience in relationships or life outside the Institute.

Magnus yawned heavily, leaning his head back. “I’m tired… I apologize I’m not more helpful.”

Alec dismissed the apology with a wave of his hand as he shifted pillows around to help Magnus settle back into the bed.

“It’s okay. Rest for now.”

When Alec’s fingers absently brushed over his shoulders, Magnus made a purring sound that warmed Alec from the inside out. He smiled as the warlock seemed to drift off.

A few moments later, Magnus whispered. “There’s a candle, I think. I need to find it.”

“Are you dreaming?”

“No, it’s the key.”

“Are we talking about a key or a candle?” Alec asked, scratching his head as he stood over Magnus.

Magnus smirked; his eyes remained closed. “The candle _is_ the key, silly Shadowhunter.”

“Oh, because that makes so much more sense,” Alec said after a short laugh. “I think you’re getting a little loopy from Catarina’s potion.”

“I am not loopy. Everything’s just really foggy.” Magnus peeled his glowing eyes open and glared teasingly, which caused Alec to laugh further.

“You’re beautiful when you laugh.” Magnus’ eyes had grown large with affection.

Alec’s mouth snapped closed like a clam, abruptly cutting off his laughter. His cheeks began to burn from the compliment; he knew his skin had turned deep red.

Magnus smiled dreamily at the sight, which Alec saw, turning his blush even deeper. Undeterred, Magnus reached his hand out, his fingers itching to touch Alec’s face, but the Shadowhunter’s tall frame put him too far away. “Reminds me of cherries,” he mumbled dopily, still trying to reach Alec's cheeks.

That was enough. Alec tilted away from the bed before he melted into the floor from embarrassment. No one had looked at him like that before. He felt … naked.

Magnus seemed to understand and fell quiet. Alec told him again to rest before turning to leave the room.

“Please don’t go,” Magnus called after him. His tired voice was strengthened by a force of longing.

Alec looked over his shoulder to see Magnus patting the bed beside him. “I know we don’t exactly know each other in a traditional sense, Alec. But I can’t bear to be away from you right now, and I can’t explain why.”

Alec didn’t need to consider his reaction. His body moved on its own accord, Magnus’ words echoing through him as if they had come from his own mouth. He slid onto the bed and laid down on top of the sheets, facing the warlock. Magnus turned on his side to look at him.

They smiled deeply at each other in the silence. After a few moments, Magnus cautiously reached for Alec’s hand. Alec flinched in surprise when he felt fingers lace through his own.

“Is this okay?” Magnus asked in a faltering whisper.

Alec’s smile only grew brighter as he tightened his grasp on Magnus’ hand.

Both the metal rings and the fingers Magnus wore them on were cold, so Alec wrapped his other hand around the warlock’s. He rubbed at Magnus’ skin to warm him, and he was pleased with himself when Magnus made that delicious purring sound again.

They continued in silence, their hands the only parts of their bodies that touched. If Alec had not been so enamored, he considered he might have been panicking. He didn’t know what was happening or why it was happening so quickly. The feelings he now felt for Magnus hit him like a freight train.

It was unlike the ever-cautious Alec Lightwood to rush and not think things through. But these moments with Magnus were different. As perplexing a situation as Magnus was in, the feelings Alec felt for him were rocksteady. Such certainty was all Alec needed to stay in that bed next to the touch-starved warlock.

He was startled out of his thoughts when Magnus spoke again. 

“I want to talk more about that candle.” Magnus' voice was partially muffled by the pillow that half of his face was pressed into; he was too exhausted to lift his head.

“I’m listening.”

“I lit it a century ago, but I don’t know where I put it.”

“Is it a special candle?” Alec mused, watching Magnus fight to keep his eyes open.

“Very special. The flame never goes out… But it needs to be extinguished.”

“How can it be extinguished if the flame never goes out?”

“I’m not sure. I think I kept that part from myself.”

Alec wondered if Magnus was confusing some old riddle in his fleeting cognizance.

“Magnus?”

“Hmm?” he pried his eyes open at the sound of his name.

“I know you need to sleep now. But, will you … will you come back?”

“I will try my best,” Magnus answered before his eyes slipped shut and his grip fell loose in Alec’s hands.

“Please come back,” Alec whispered and held onto the other’s hand tighter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Still so much left unanswered, but what do you think about Magnus' visit with Alec?


	6. Falling Down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec began the evening with Magnus, not knowing it would end with Bane.

Alec began the evening with Magnus, not knowing it would end with Bane.

Thirty-two hours had passed since Magnus took Catarina’s magic restoration potion. Unfortunately, the warlock had remained asleep for most of those hours. It was something Catarina had assured Alec over the phone as normal. Not only had someone slipped something in Magnus’ drink at Pandemonium to weaken him, but Catarina’s potent tonic required substantial rest to replenish magic.

Even with Catarina’s reassurances, though, Alec struggled with bubbling anticipation while he waited for the warlock to wake up. Even his own Shadowhunter-bred discipline did nothing to quell his anxiety.

Alec’s skin itched for Magnus’ touch.

He ached to feel like he did when Magnus had simply looked at him and smiled. With or without his cat eyes, it didn’t matter. He just wanted him to open his eyes and be there with him again.

Magnus was a magnet, pulling Alec in like steel.

He barely knew the warlock, but such feelings refused to go unexplored. And, for as crazy as it all would sound if he spoke any of it out loud, he just couldn’t fight it. In fact, he didn’t even _want_ to. And maybe that was what scared Alec most.

\--

Finally, though, Magnus had awoken. Alec was on the phone in the living room when Magnus emerged from the bedroom late in the afternoon.

“Thanks for the update, Jace. I have to go.” He ended his call as Magnus wandered over to slide into the vacant corner of the couch.

He stared curiously at the cell phone in Alec’s hands.

“You didn’t have to end your conversation for me,” he said, bringing his knees up to his chest and smiling coyly.

“It’s fine.” Alec had not received good news from Jace. Kaelie and the other Seelie who Bane interacted with at Pandemonium had been killed in the demon attack there that night. They had no leads on who tainted the drink or who gave it to the Seelies to pass off to Bane.

“So, how … how do you feel, Magnus?”

“Very well. I’m just sorry if I slept too long.”

“You lost a whole day and a half, but Catarina said that’s normal.”

Magnus raised his arm in a graceful swipe. Both men watched as a trail of blue sparks, bright and alive, streamed from his hand. 

“My magic appears to be back to normal.” He snapped his fingers. A mug of steaming hot coffee appeared in his hands. He grinned in satisfaction just as Alec frowned.

“Would you like one?” Magnus offered, preparing his fingers to snap another cup into existence.

Alec shook his head, biting his tongue before he could scold Magnus for using his magic.

The warlock shrugged and began sipping from the mug warming his hands.

“What do you remember?” Alec asked.

“You. With me. I asked you to stay with me… And you did.” Magnus’ lips quirked into a bashful grin.

“I did.”

“And, you asked me to come back.”

“And you did.” Alec swallowed, unable to say more. Everything about Magnus appealed to him. The sheepish expression painting the warlock’s face at that moment was new to Alec’s eyes, and it caused his heart to melt even more.

“Now what, Alexander?”

The question snapped Alec’s mind back onto the mission at hand. “Now. Now, we need to find out who’s messing with your magic.”

“Ah, yes. You mentioned something about a poisoned drink at this Pandemonium place?”

“Seelies gave it to you, but it wasn’t Seelie magic. So, I think someone else had them pass it off to you.”

“... I’m sorry I can’t be more helpful in this situation.”

Alec flinched at Magnus' disheartened tone. “Maybe you can help with another situation. You spoke about some eternal candle before you fell asleep. What’s that about?”

Magnus stared in confusion as he shifted through his hazy thoughts. “Oh, yes. I vaguely recall the candle.”

“Is it real?”

“Of course it’s real,” Magnus replied with a small huff.

“What does it mean, though?”

“It’s part of a spell. Or a curse. I can’t… I can’t remember the details.”

“Does it have something to do with what happened to you and Bane?”

“Yes. At least I’m fairly sure.”

“You said the flame never goes out but that it needed to be extinguished. Do you remember how to do that?”

Magnus gazed helplessly at the Shadowhunter. “I don’t know. I..I don’t even know where it is now.” 

Alec could feel the anguished frustration brewing inside Magus at not knowing such crucial details. Instinctively, he reached over and placed his hand on Magnus’ knee, squeezing gently. A reverent intimation meant to console. Before meeting Magnus, Alec only felt inclined to dole out such comforting gestures to his siblings. No one else.

“It’s okay. We’ll figure this out.”

Magnus sniffed and nodded.

“Tonight is a warlock party. We should tell Catarina you won’t attend.”

“What?”

“A local warlock, Lorenzo. He’s having some event. It’s not safe. If someone found out about … you and … Bane… It’s just not good right now with the attack on your magic.”

Alec watched another fresh expression settle over Magnus. Determination. “You don’t know me well yet, dear, but no one keeps me from a party.”

\--

Later that evening, Magnus was enthusiastically preparing to attend the gala hosted by the fellow warlock, Lorenzo Rey.

“Do you really think going tonight is a good idea?” Alec asked for the second time that evening, arms crossed over his chest. He leaned against the wall under the bedroom entryway, concerned.

“It will be fine, Alexander. You said Catarina told you the High Warlock is expected to attend all formal warlock gatherings. That, and you cannot fathom how long it has been since I’ve attended a party.” He had been applying his makeup in front of the mirror but stopped to turn and face Alec.

Under Magnus’ gaze, Alec felt a fluttering sensation begin to flap against his ribcage. He suddenly understood the mundane expression of having butterflies.

Magnus sparkled.

And the sparkle didn’t just come from the glitter dusted over his perfectly coifed spikes of hair.

Not from the new stripes of shimmer that lined his eyes either.

Not even because his highlighted cheekbones caught the light in a dewy way that made it look like tiny stars were embedded in his skin.

No, it wasn’t any of that.

Magnus _himself_ sparkled.

The shine was like an aura, coming from his mischievous smile and the lively glint in his eyes. The tiny bounce in his step as he spun around to grab his last pieces of jewelry. The affection that exuded from him like a sweet-smelling cologne.

Alec noticed it all. It was everywhere, like Magnus himself was a spark, and he was making the whole damn room shine.

Magnus’ soft laugh pulled Alec from his daze, which he might have been stuck in for a beat too long.

Magnus had noticed him staring. He sauntered across the room with smooth, gliding steps and came to a stop in front of him. His plush lips curved into a smirk as he noticed a fresh blush creep across Alec’s face.

“What is it, pretty boy? Do you like what you see?”

Alec couldn’t hold in an aroused groan; it escaped under his breath, and he ducked his head self-consciously.

Magnus tipped it back up with a finger under the Shadowhunter’s chin. A gentle fondness glowed in Magnus’ brown eyes as he stared up at the slightly taller man.

“There’s no need to be shy around me. You’re beautiful, Alexander.”

Alec’s cheeks only flushed several shades deeper in response. Magnus’ coy smile grew wider before he noticed Alec shift uncomfortably.

The warlock's expression became quizzical. “Has no one ever told you that before?”

Alec shook his head stiffly, pleasantly frightened by how close to him Magnus now stood. “No, they haven’t. I mean I-I’m not,” he waved his hand in the air, “a pretty boy or whatever.”

“Oh, but you most certainly are.”

Alec scoffed, scratching at the back of his neck awkwardly. “Yeah right, whatever you say, fancy face.”

Magnus’ face lit in delighted surprise while Alec’s froze in sheer mortification. The Shadowhunter swallowed thickly, not knowing where the nickname came from or why he would ever speak it out loud. He never spoke like that.

Magnus let out a mirthful sigh of contentment before tapping Alec affectionately on the tip of his nose. He stepped away to finish getting ready for the night.

When Alec’s pangs of embarrassment settled enough for his blush to fade, he refocused efforts to make Magnus reconsider attending Lorenzo’s party.

“I’m still not convinced showing up at the warlock event is the best idea, Magnus. You don’t even know who Lorenzo is. Bane does; not you.”

“I appreciate your concern; I knew you have a big heart. But everything will be fine.”

“The other warlocks might notice something’s off. You’re very … different from Bane.”

“Then, it’s a good thing I’m such a talented thespian.” Magnus waved his arms theatrically. “That, and I look exactly like him … you know, on account of us being the same person and all.” He gave a lighthearted wink and whirled out of the bedroom.

Alec grunted softly in disagreement but otherwise remained quiet as he followed him out.

Magnus finished affixing a silver jewelry cuff onto his ear as he looked Alec up and down, eyes creased in sincerity as he smiled kindly.

“Though, perhaps you might want to change into something more … properly suited for such an evening out?”

Alec looked himself over, finding nothing overtly wrong with his attire. Black jeans and a black V-neck tee-shirt, which may or may not have had a few holes ripped through it. He wasn’t even wearing his sweater jacket - something so faded and unraveling that even he considered the garment to be on its last legs.

“I don’t have anything nicer with me… or even back at the Institute really.”

Magnus seemed to consider this for a moment before nodding carefully.

Alec shrugged. He had never given a second thought to the clothes he wore because he never expected to feel a desire to impress anybody in that way. After all, his upbringing at the Institute taught him not to hope for much. Especially in Alec’s case, where he learned early on that he could never have what he genuinely dreamed of: finding love in someone … another man. The Shadowhunter way-of-life did not openly condone such things.

The poignant look of understanding in Magnus’ expression surprised Alec. Had he gleaned such a nuanced piece of Alec’s inner struggle without needing to be told?

Magnus blinked a few times, appearing to clear something caught in his eye. Then, he clasped his hands together, and his smile grew impossibly warmer.

“Yes, well you _do_ look lovely as you are, darling, truly. But let’s celebrate in style tonight … erm … may I?”

Alec gave an apprehensive nod. But before he could decode Magnus’ intent, the warlock had already flicked his hands out.

Magnus’ magic began to dance along Alec's skin, causing his mind to flash on a memory. Abruptly, he recalled the sparkling orange torrents of magic that Bane had used to save him from falling to his death on the night they first met. 

The sensation of Magnus’ magic when compared to Bane’s was both at once familiar and entirely brand new.

Bane’s magic had been fiery and alive. Tinged by darkness like the dusk. It was magic fueled by longing and desperation and even guilt-ridden hopefulness – all swirled together and hiding within its folds like shadow. Confusing but utterly captivating, nonetheless.

Magnus’ magic now was bright and open. Warm. Lighthearted and free-wheeling. Playful even.

Yes, Alec found the fascinating warlock’s magic to be different when he yielded it as Magnus from when as Bane. Yet, it held something in common. Both strains of magic cocooned Alec in a distinct sense of warmth, relaxed and protected. It felt like coming home.

“There we go.”

Magnus’ words snapped him out of his ponderings. He looked down to see himself dressed in an entirely new outfit. Clothes that weren’t his but still fit perfectly, even if a tad snugger than he was used to. Dark navy slacks and a matching blazer. Shiny shoes and a crisp button-down shirt. He didn’t own something as nice as this suit.

“Uh, thank you?”

Magnus’ eyes gleamed with pleasure as he nodded.

“But, ah, maybe you should still take it easy with the magic, Magnus.”

“Nonsense. I feel right as rain. Besides, magicking a change of clothes is hardly more than a tiny pinch of energy.”

“Look, I know Catarina’s potion helped, but it depletes quickly.”

Magnus rolled his eyes, pursing his lips into a pout.

“We can chat more about that gloomy topic after the party, I promise. Come now. Let’s head out. I simply cannot wait to see Cat tonight.”

Alec’s eyebrows furrowed, but he made a concentrated effort not to push any further. Who was he to tell a centuries-old warlock how to use his magic anyway?

\--

Lorenzo’s gala was at a Downworlder venue called, Lacuna. A large, skyscraper of a building. The tallest Shadow World building in the United States, and one that served many purposes. Several floors were dedicated hotel rooms, while others made up office and convention space for international Downworld gatherings.

Neither Alec nor Magnus had been there before. Magnus couldn’t be sure if Bane ever had. Regardless, a portal trip was out of the question in this case. A mundane cab ride would have to suffice. Both men appreciated the quiet comfort of sitting next to each other as the vehicle made its way through the city.

Magnus had rolled his window down, despite the frigid autumn air. He couldn’t stop looking at the city lights and bustling traffic. Every few moments he would turn to face Alec with glints of wonder dancing in his wide eyes.

Alec felt the corners of his lips tug into an affectionate smile as he watched Magnus take in the city as if he was seeing it for the first time. Alec then realized it just might be his first time – seeing it as it looked now anyway. He immediately saddened when he thought about how long Magnus had been trapped in … in whatever limbo he had been relegated to when the warlock’s mind split into two selves.

Hesitantly, and to come across as accidental a gesture as possible, Alec inched his fingers along the car seat, slowly closing the gap of space between them. His hand brushed brush against Magnus' hand. Magnus didn't hesitate, quickly hooking his pinky finger around Alec’s as he continued gazing out the window.

“Alexander, this is a beautiful night. Absolutely beautiful.”

\--

At the end of their cab ride, they were still several blocks away from Lacuna. Magnus had wanted to walk the rest of the way.

They strode through the city’s crisp night air, soon coming across an older woman tucked against a concrete corner formed by an apartment building and the stairway leading up to it. It seemed she might have been homeless. Her skin was dirty, her hair matted, and her clothes riddled with holes. She was rubbing her hands together as if trying to stay warm when Magnus came to a stop on the sidewalk in front of her.

The woman looked up and hissed, “Whatcha lookin’ at?”

“Good evening, miss.” Magnus’ greeting was steady and warm.

The lady merely glared at them both, possibly to figure out if they were here to cause her trouble or ridicule her. That’s what people tended to do when they didn’t just walk on by and ignore her completely.

“It’s chilly tonight. I’d like to offer you this.” Alec watched Magnus shrug off his long jacket.

The woman snorted at that, but she accepted the garment anyway, rough fingers catching along the silky inner lining. It was clear to her that it was an expensive piece of clothing. “This is too nice to wear. Out of place here.”

Magnus chuckled as if refreshed. “I’ve come to learn that most things, and even people for that matter, are out of place.”

The woman smirked as she continued to admire the heavy coat in her hands. “Ain’t that right.”

Alec stayed a step back as he watched the exchange silence. The woman’s tone had softened.

“I can’t use this here,” the lady claimed again, more adamant.

“Then feel free to sell it. It’s definitely top of the line.” Magnus held his hands behind his back casually, and with a subtle snap of his fingers, a small pile of blankets and a bag of toiletries appeared on the steps above the woman.

He stepped over to pick them up, quickly setting them beside her. She gasped when she caught sight of the items. “Where did all this come from?”

“Does it matter?” Magnus asked with an innocent wink.

Alec stepped up beside the warlock. The air was frigid, but he absorbed the warmth radiating from Magnus.

“Ma’am, would you like us to escort you somewhere? A friend’s maybe, or the mission?” Alec asked. “It’s going to be a cold night.”

The woman smiled finally. “No, boys. I’m good. I get there every night just fine on my own.”

“If you’re sure.”

“Yes. Th-thank you for this.” She smiled again, and it was genuine.

“Take care, miss.” Magnus patted her shoulder before they moved on.

“That was nice of you,” Alec said when they were half a block away.

“It was nothing, actually. Tomorrow, she will still be on the street.” Magnus’ voice had lost a bit of its enchantment.

“Still, you helped her. Kindness goes a long way.”

“Kindness is not enough. Demons may be what Shadowhunters protect mundanes from. But there are other forms of darkness being suffered in this world. I don’t like seeing it. I like inaction over it even less.”

Alec nodded, unsure of what else to say. But internally, he began to buzz with excitement. Something shifted within him at hearing Magnus’ words. He had never thought of things in that way.

To protect both the mundane society and the Shadow World, Alec was raised to do one thing only: hunt demons. But both worlds carried other kinds of shadow. Shouldn’t the Nephilim use their angel-blooded power to do something more? His mind began to race with ideas on what that something more could be.

He walked beside Magnus, becoming more enamored by the moment. They soon fell into a comfortable silence on their way to the party.

Alec marveled. Inside Magnus lived a demon, a madman, and something closer to an angel than any Shadowhunter would ever be.

\--

“Catarina said Lorenzo’s party is on the seventieth floor,” Alec said as they entered the lobby. _How over-the-top_ , Alec mused as they stepped into one of the elevators.

“Seventy? As in seven-zero?” Magnus asked, eyes widening in awe. He watched Alec nod and press the number’s button as the doors slid closed.

The elevator cab lurched to a stop only a minute into its ascent. Magnus and Alec looked regained their balance from the unexpected jolt and looked at each other in confusion. Before either could speak, though, a thunderous bang came from the ceiling and shook the cabin again.

“What was that?”

“Not sure.” Alec pulled his seraph blade out and stepped to the other side of the cab, placing himself in front of Magnus as they both stared at the ceiling.

Scratching sounds made it clear whatever had landed on the top of the elevator intended on getting inside. A loud keening sound assaulted their ears followed by frantic gnawing.

“Demon.” They both surmised in unison. Magnus called his magic; his hands became engulfed in dancing flame as he readied himself for battle alongside Alec. The elevator swayed with the beast’s frenzied attempts to claw its way in.

A sudden tug in Magnus’ mind caught him off guard. He shook his head to clear away the sensation.

Alec looked over to see alarm washing over the warlock’s face.

“It’s okay. I got this, Magnus.” Alec pushed Magnus further behind him.

“No. It’s not that. It’s … I can’t.” He fell to his knees and grabbed his head in his hands.

One of the ceiling tiles started to shake loose. A snapping sound echoed through the air, and the entire elevator cabin swayed.

Magnus shouted from the floor, not words but growls of anger and alarm. He squirmed away from an invisible force as if fighting against something within him. 

Alec knelt and put a hand on his back. “What’s wrong?”

“I’m s-sorry, I can’t stay-” he rasped out before curling further inside himself.

“Magnus.” Alec shook him hard. “Magnus!”

The warlock pulled his face out from behind his hands. “What in the hell is going on?”

Alec gaped down at Magnus' face and found wild eyes staring angrily back at him. He watched the way he clenched his jaw and at once knew it was Bane. Magnus was … gone.

“Demon attack.”

“Are we in an …”

“An elevator? Yeah.”

Suddenly, the entire ceiling caved in, tiles and debris raining down on them. Along with the pieces, an angry shax demon toppled in.

Bane hadn't fully gained his senses after waking up to a demon attack in a teetering elevator, and so he wasn’t prepared when the creature lunged at him. It knocked him flat onto the ground.

The cab tilted to the left and swung again before another snapping sound came from above. The final cable cord snapped apart, dropping the entire cabin into sudden free fall.

Alec stood up and sliced through the demon easily enough. The damage was already done, though; the elevator continued to plummet, flying tens of floors down.

Bane pushed himself up, wasting no time after that. His arms jutted straight out on either side of him. He grunted and forced his magic to clamp the emergency brakes shut. The elevator slowed down before screeching to a full stop.

Alec caught his breath, activated his strength rune, and tried to pry the metal doors apart. Several moments later, they still wouldn’t move. He pounded at them in anger before turning back to the warlock. “They won’t budge.”

Bane’s eyes were pinched shut and a line of sweat had formed along his forehead. Alec estimated the elevator weighed somewhere over five-thousand pounds. The magic streaming out of Bane was the only thing keeping it up in the air.

“What about a portal?” Alec asked.

Bane pried his eyes open only to roll them at Alec’s suggestion. “I need to know where I am to do that ... not only where to go.” He panted heavily as his arms began to tremble from strain

Alec looked up to where the ceiling used to be. He could see the dark vertical shaft above. Perhaps they could climb out and use the rafters as steps.

Bane grunted in pain, and the cabin suddenly slipped down another few feet before he could refocus his magic’s grip on the brakes.

“I can’t hold this much longer,” Bane choked out.

A determined look settled over his face. He slowly raised his left arm and pointed it at the ceiling, diverting magic from one of the emergency brakes to the shaft above them.

The cabin tilted, lurching lop-sided downward where Bane’s magic no longer held the left brake in place. The elevator cabin continued to slip, now at an angle, screeching with every inch.

Alec’s eyes fell back to Bane, who was focusing on the space above them. A thick stream of orange magic whipped out from his free hand, forming a long, rope-like beam straight above them.

“What are you doing?” Alec asked.

“Getting us the hell out of here. Grab onto me now before I let go of the other brake.”

Alec stared blankly, not understanding.

“Now, Shadowhunter!” Bane yelled.

Alec didn’t hesitate again. He stepped closer and wound his arm around Bane's back as tightly as he could. Though it was awkward, he pressed his fingers firmly against the warlock’s chest.

Bane suppressed a growl of pain as he lowered his right hand, finally relinquishing control of the other emergency brake’s clamps. His now free arm snaked around Alec, pulling him more securely against his side just as the last brake clamps popped open, throwing the elevator into utter free-fall once again.

“Hold on, Alec,” Bane instructed as he focused all of his magic up through his right arm, raised above them.

Even as the elevator itself plunged to the dark pit of the building, Alec and Bane suddenly rocketed out of the cabin, shooting up the vertical shaft toward the roof - tethered to Bane’s ribbon of magic like a bungee cord.


	7. Tiny Sparks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec didn’t blink or falter at the harsh scowl Bane had him pinned under. He defiantly tightened his grasp on the warlock’s wrist. 
> 
> “Do not test me, Lightwood. I am in the mood to dissolve something, and I have just enough magic left to do it.”

It was like flying.

Bane’s beam of magic pulled them both up the elevator shaft at such breakneck speed that Alec felt wind slapping against his face. He clung to Bane’s front like a koala bear to a tree. Had there been even a second to think amidst the chaos, he might have been embarrassed by his intimate proximity to the warlock’s body. He might even have been disappointed that it wasn’t Magnus that he held onto. But there wasn’t time to dwell on such things.

The elevator cabin they escaped from moments earlier now plummeted in the darkness far below, chains and cords chewed apart by a now-banished demon. Seconds later, it smashed to pieces at the building’s rock-bottom in a thunderous clash of screeching metal. The booming sound echoed up the passageway, loud enough to make Alec’s ears ring.

Bane tightened his one-armed grip around Alec and forced another pop of magic through his free hand. It flew out above them, an angry fireball gaining speed as it raced to the top of the shaft. Until it hit the ceiling and exploded, effectively blasting the rooftop hatch wide open. Their exit. 

The air whipping around them turned fresh and cold as they shot through the narrow opening. They were flung out of the ceiling hatch and up into the night sky as if the building had just spit them out. 

Though now free from the elevator shaft, they were still tethered to that potent cord of magic streaming out of Bane’s palm. It slowed down, but it didn’t stop. Like a balloon softly lifting them into the sky.

Bane keened in frustration as he wrangled the magic with fading strength.

He had thrown everything he had into stalling the elevator’s collapse and creating their escape. Now, he needed just enough energy to control the magic he’d already unleashed. To steer it away from the powerful bolt tugging them skyward and instead direct it into a soft landing on the roof below.

But the dancing whip of magic was more powerful than he was now. He didn’t have enough strength left.

“I can’t control it anymore,” Bane said in a defeated rush of breath as they dangled tens of feet above the rooftop.

Alec at once understood there was no safe way back down, and they were only drifting further into the sky. Bane couldn’t convert the magic already released; all he could do was to let go of it.

“Then let’s jump before we get any higher.” Alec looked down, preparing mentally for the fall. Without warning, he released one of his arms from around Bane’s chest, an action that startled the warlock, who reacted by gripping Alec closer against his chest.

“I just need my stele,” Alec said as he slipped it out of his pocket while still clinging on to Bane with his other arm. Without hesitation, he activated his sure-footed rune. “Okay. Ready.”

Bane nodded. “This might hurt,” he warned through gritted teeth. Obviously. He let his extended arm fall limply to his side, at once cutting his connection to the magic stream. Orange sparks fizzled out around his hand. The cord of magic flashed once above them, brightly, before it abruptly dissipated into thin air.

The magic was severed from Bane now, and gravity took over.

With nothing more to hold them up, Alec and Bane’s bodies plunged back to the roof below. As they plummeted, Alec swiftly maneuvered the warlock into his arms. He scooped him up and prepared for the landing. Bane grunted in surprise but couldn’t do much but hold on as they dropped.

Even as the cold night air rushed past, that dreadful freefall felt like slow motion. At least until the moment of impact. When they slammed into the rooftop, everything became a sped-up blur of black sky and gray cement.

Even with the sure-footed rune, the fall’s height was too great for Alec to manage a perfect landing. The brunt of impact caused Bane to spill out of Alec’s arms and tumble like a ragdoll over the concrete. Alec himself stumbled into a somersault before his body rolled to a stop.

Finally, they were still.

No more flying, no more falling.

Alec could only lie there, dazed and catching his breath. He watched Bane a few yards away struggling to get up on his hands and knees.

Seconds passed. Maybe minutes. Alec wasn’t sure. Awareness returned only when Bane shouted his name.

“Alec!” The warlock stumbled over. “Are you all right?”

The concern in Bane’s husky voice made Alec curious. He sat up just as the warlock fell to his knees beside him.

“How badly are you injured?” Bane asked in the same worried tone. His ring-laden fingers squeezed Alec’s shoulders.

The gesture was open and compassionate, warm even. Uncharacteristic enough to make Alec wonder who was really with him there on the roof.

“Magnus?” He couldn’t help but ask.

Alec realized his mistake at once. The other man’s gentle expression flickered away, replaced by one pained and crestfallen. His eyes suddenly hardened, and his jaw clenched in a way that made it clear to Alec that this was still very much Bane.

“I-I’m sorry,” Alec said quickly.

The damage was already done, though. Bane’s face slipped into an unreadable mask, and he ripped his hands away from Alec as if recoiling from flame.

“Are you hurt?” Bane asked again, this time in an angry shout.

Alec’s ankle throbbed dully, but he was fine other than that and a few scrapes. He retrieved his stele, this time to activate his Iratze. “I’m okay... Are you?”

“I’ll live.” He brushed his shirt off and stood up. As he did so, his body teetered to the side in the slightest way, just enough for Alec to notice.

As Alec got to his feet, he lamented over how off track the night had gone in just a few short minutes. Instead of in a ballroom with Magnus, he was on the top of a Brooklyn skyscraper with Bane. He couldn’t stop the swell of sadness when he thought back to how excited Magnus had been to attend the party. Now, he wouldn’t get to.

“Where are we?” Bane cut through his thoughts. His voice was cold again, as icy as the withering night’s wind gusting around them.

“Lacuna. We’re here for Lorenzo’s warlock party.”

“But that’s not until….” Bane trailed off, his eyes darting from one invisible thought to another, trying to work something out in his head.

“Bane…” Alec said after a few moments.

“… I … I seem to have lost some time,” Bane admitted. His gaze fell to the cement.

Alec stepped closer. “What do you remember?”

Bane stepped further away. “Pandemonium. Vaguely… I was with you, but I forget everything else.”

“You were drugged somehow and soon after, demons attacked the nightclub. Catarina took us back to your place.”

He nodded curtly and crossed his arms over his chest. “And here we are, after another demon attack… Some bodyguard I have,” he said flippantly.

Alec shrugged, recognizing the warlock’s jab as a defense mechanism. It was easier to act angry than to admit hurt. He understood that. “Hey, I wasn’t the one in favor of coming tonight.”

Granted, it wasn’t Bane’s idea either. Alec’s thoughts landed on Magnus again, and his chest fluttered. He wanted to see more of the coy warlock and his dreamy smile.

The attention-catching cough Bane made startled the grin right off Alec’s face.

“I don’t want to spend the entire night up here. What floor is Rey’s party on?”

“We shouldn’t go. There could be another attack.”

“We won’t be alone. I think a room full of warlocks can handle it. Besides, we wouldn’t want to miss an opportunity to show off that outfit. I didn’t think you owned a suit.”

“No, Bane. We need to get back to the loft, and I need to report back to my father. We can’t think the demon attacks are a coincidence any longer. They’re somehow connected to your magic issues.”

Bane grimaced. “Don’t mind then, if I take my _issues_ … and attend the event on my own.” He spun away to find a door back into the building but stopped rigidly when he felt Alec’s hand grab him. He looked down at the pale hand on his wrist and then up, glaring at Alec like he hoped he would spontaneously combust.

Alec didn’t blink or falter at the harsh scowl Bane had him pinned under. He defiantly tightened his grasp on the warlock’s wrist.

“Do not test me, Lightwood. I am in the mood to dissolve something, and I have just enough magic left to do it.”

Face-to-face, the two men fell into a staring contest, each daring the other to back down, yet neither budged. In those moments, their anger mixed with … something else. They hadn’t made eye contact before. Not like this.

Bane wanted to continue shooting daggers at Alec, this Shadowhunter who had stepped over the line he’d drawn around himself. Bane didn’t invite him in. He didn’t ask for any of this. But Alec was there anyway, and he stared at him in a way no one ever had before like he saw something more than heartache and endless winter in him. Like he saw through his carefully assembled mask. It was the first thing in decades that made him feel hope, and it was terrifying. He wanted it to stop.

Both men’s breathing accelerated as they did nothing but stand there, a mere foot apart from each other.

Alec could see so much in Bane’s dark eyes when he was allowed the chance to look closely enough. A world of sadness peeked out from the shroud of intense anger. A stubborn sense of hope was there too, almost pleading for something. What that something was, Alec didn’t know yet, but oh how he was intrigued by it.

Soon, Bane’s anger returned in full force and washed over everything. His glare was like fire now, and Alec felt burned just by looking at it. Bane was fragile. But not fragile like a dainty dandelion puff. Fragile like a ticking bomb.

Alec decided the warlock wouldn’t give in, and he didn’t want to be what set him off. With a heavy sigh, he pushed Bane’s hand out of his grasp.

Bane straightened his shoulders victoriously, but a troubled look had dashed across his features when Alec let him go.

“We will be quick,” Bane offered, sensing the Shadowhunter’s frustration.

Alec gave a perfunctory nod and followed him. Whether he was with Magnus or Bane, Alec was having a hard time saying no, even when he knew better. He vowed to work on that.

\--

Bane raised his arm in front of Alec’s chest to stop him from entering the ballroom. “We can’t go in like this,” he said and snapped his fingers before Alec could stop him.

A small mist of magic breezed over them, at once mending the fabric tears in their clothes and removing the smudges of dirt they received from their flight on the roof.

“We could have found Catarina to help with that,” Alec said through gritted teeth. Bane merely shrugged before gesturing for Alec to enter.

The ballroom was extravagant. Crystal-dripping chandeliers hung from the eighteen-foot ceiling. Beneath, well over a hundred eclectically clad warlocks mingled about. Catarina appeared from a small group of them and walked over to them. She gently tugged along a little girl in a red tulle dress who clung to her side.

“Bane, Alec,” Catarina said, looking at Bane wistfully while she greeted them. “Madzie, this is Alec. Bane’s friend.”

“Well, hello there,” Alec said and smiled at the girl who moved to hide shyly behind Catarina’s leg. Catarina looked like she was trying to figure out if it was Magnus or Bane who stood there with them.

“Bane is sparkly,” Madzie said with a giggle as she peeked out from Catarina’s skirt.

Judging by Madzie’s comment and Catarina’s wondering expression, Alec determined Bane’s makeup regime tended to be much less glittery than what Magnus had chosen to wear that night.

Catarina’s eyes turned curiously over to Alec. She had hoped to catch a glimpse of her old friend, Magnus.

Alec shook his head discreetly to answer her unspoken question. Her face fell in disappointment. Alec wasn’t the only one who noticed.

Bane pushed his shoulders back and skirted his stare across the room. “Good evening, ladies,” he greeted, voice flat as he scanned the crowd. “How’s the party?”

“Boring,” Madzie answered, her candor causing the adults to smile. Even Bane’s lips twitched a little.

“Lorenzo’s really schmoozing folks up, even more than usual. I wonder what he’s angling for now,” Catarina said.

“Something tasteless, I’m sure. I better find him and make an appearance. I promised my babysitter here we’d be quick.”

Alec rolled his eyes and made to follow Bane as Madzie giggled. They didn’t have to go far. Lorenzo caught sight of them while he droned on to a couple of warlocks near the bar about his latest acquisition, an alabaster kohl pot from the ancient Egyptian dynasty. Alec fought hard not to roll his eyes again, this time over the man’s pomposity.

When Bane approached, the two other warlocks recognized their exit opportunity and dismissed themselves with relieved faces.

“Bane, so nice of you to make it.” Lorenzo waved him over. “And you brought your Shadowhunter friend.”

“Yes, I’ve been busy but wanted to drop in. It’s productive for the warlock community to gather together from time to time, so I want to support your efforts here.”

Alec listened to Bane’s diplomatic tone. It wasn’t friendly, but it was confident and assertive, befitting of a leader. Lorenzo almost squirmed under it. Alec watched the self-importance waft off the party’s host, and it made clear to him that the envious man wasn’t Bane’s biggest fan.

“Speaking of being busy, I’m curious what the efforts of the Institute are concerning the increase in demon sightings lately?” Lorenzo asked, shifting gears as he eyed Alec.

Bane’s eyebrows raised. “I haven’t heard from any other Downworlders about it.”

Lorenzo’s eyes darted back to Bane. “How could you not? We were all there at Pandemonium the other night.”

“Such events happen from time to time, as they always have. We wouldn’t call that an influx, would we?”

Alec stiffened in alert. He had been in contact with Jace and Izzy; there hadn’t been any spike in demon activity in the city. Only isolated incidents where Bane was concerned. The recent sacrifice of one of Lacuna’s elevators was proof of that, but no one knew about it yet. He wondered what else Lorenzo could be alluding to.

“I suppose not,” the long-haired warlock said. “Nevertheless, I do hope the Shadowhunters are investigating to be sure nothing’s amiss. Not dilly-dallying with our High Warlock.”

At that, Bane’s disinterested stance snapped to attention. He stepped into Lorenzo’s space and glowered down at him.

The sneer of a fake smile crept onto Lorenzo’s face; he seemed almost openly excited to have irked his superior.

Alec ignored Bane’s agitated sigh when he stepped in between the two warlocks.

“The New York Institute is working hard to connect more authentically with the Downworld,” Alec began to spin the story he had concocted to cover his true reason for becoming Bane’s shadow.

“Bane has been a gracious leader, and we are optimistic at the level of collaboration so far. We’re even exploring the possibility of a Downworld cabinet meeting to ensure everyone has a seat at the table. I support what Bane said. The Shadowhunters have not seen any increase in demon activity like you mention.”

Lorenzo’s beady eyes scurried back and forth between Bane and Alec, clearly displeased to hear such praise for the High Warlock.

Bane stepped around Alec and reset himself in front of Lorenzo’s face. “I expect more from such a prominent member of our community, Lorenzo. Do me a favor and send rumors like that my way instead of helping perpetuate them.”

Lorenzo nodded curtly. “Yes, of course. My apologies. Let’s leave this conversation on the right foot. A toast to this burgeoning partnership in the Shadow World perhaps. Shall I grab us some drinks?”

“That won’t be necessary. Enjoy the rest of your party,” Bane said definitively, pressing at his temple tiredly as he stepped away.

“Well, be sure to stop by and have a drink on your own before you leave then,” Lorenzo called after him. “Tell the bartender Lorenzo sent you for an Old Fashioned. They’re exquisite.”

Alec had already started to follow Bane through the crowd but stopped dead in his tracks when he heard Lorenzo’s offer. _Old Fashioned_. It was the name of the drink the Seelies had given Bane that night in Pandemonium.

“What’s wrong with you?” Bane asked, looking over his shoulder. “I thought you wanted to leave as quickly as possible.”

“Yes, we should leave. I’ll tell you later. Can you ask Catarina to portal us back?” Alec took a few long strides to catch up.

“I’m perfectly capable of creating a portal,” Bane answered petulantly as he made his way to a set of exit doors, moving quicker once free from the mingling groups of warlocks. “And don’t step in for me like that again. What you did back there with Lorenzo.”

“I was trying to help.”

“Well don’t,” Bane snapped. They were in the hallway now, away from everyone. “I don’t need a damn hero, Alec. I will remedy this, or it will all end in ruin. But either way, it will be on my own.”

With that, he whipped around and waved a portal into existence. The action sent an immediate dizzy spell shuddering through him, and he swayed under the sudden loss of balance.

Alec held back the ‘I told you so’ that landed on his tongue as he reached out to steady Bane on his feet.

“I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not.”

Together, they stepped through the portal, pressed against each other’s sides for the second time that night. Seconds later, they were back in the apartment.

Even within the private safety of the living room, Alec didn’t let go, and Bane didn’t pull away.

He leaned into Alec’s strength, suddenly too tired to care about his pride any longer. He was smart enough to realize he would have stumbled to the floor had Alec not been holding onto his waist. Creating the portal home had zapped away what precious little magic he had left.

Alec brought his other hand against Bane’s back to guide him to the bedroom. He noticed how Bane winced from the touch.

“Why didn’t we just ask Catarina to make the portal?”

Irritated, Bane merely growled under his breath, thinking it the most proper response.

“Or to heal you?” Alec pushed.

“I don’t need to be healed.”

Alec sighed. “You’ve been a little unsteady on your feet since the roof, and I’ve seen you hold your head a couple times. I’m pretty sure you have cuts under your clothes from the fall too.”

“Stalker,” Bane said with a huff.

“You’re so stubborn. Catarina could have helped.”

“I’m the High Warlock of Brooklyn.”

“But she’s your close friend, right? She would understand, and she can help until this whole thing ends.”

“Nothing ever ends.” Centuries of heartache had taught Bane that lesson. _Darkness doesn’t ever go away. It just lingers, wearing dents into the soul. Even when numbed, the weight of the world builds squarely on shaky shoulders._

There was no breaking free from that burden. Bane only knew how to endure it.

Alec ignored the dismal assertation, even as it pinched painfully at his heart. _What had happened to this man?_

“I will help you treat your wounds while you answer my questions.”

Bane opened his mouth to argue but gave up before he spoke; instead, he nodded. He was too exhausted to fight, and Alec’s stern tone got through to him. The Shadowhunter would not be swayed this time.

“Very well.” Bane made his way across the room to the vanity, collapsing wearily onto the tufted bench seat. “Let’s get this over with.”

Alec watched the warlock lean his elbows on the table and drop his head into his hands. The painted nails rubbed forcefully through spiked trusses of hair, even pulling at them in a seeming effort to calm the frustration surging in his veins. Even blanketed by heavy fatigue, Bane’s turmoil pulsed within him, flowing just beneath the surface.

When Bane’s shoulders sunk in dejection, Alec moved to collect the supplies needed. He hurried back with the black tin Catarina had left them, a bowl of water, a couple of hand towels, and a mundane first aid kit he’d picked up on his way back to the loft that first morning when Ragnor had fortified the building’s wards. He set the items down on the bed and dunked one of the washcloths in water before rejoining Bane in front of the vanity.

Alec's breath caught in his throat when he saw swaths of tan skin; Bane had unbuttoned his shirt.

The strangle of air made a gasping hiccup sound that Bane noticed. He watched Alec through the mirror as he finished peeling his shirt off and tossed the garment to the carpet below as he stared carefully. “What?”

“Um, n-nothing.” Alec’s cheeks grew heated.

An imperceptible smirk peeked across Bane’s face before his expression slipped back into one of bleakness. His eyes moved from Alec back to himself in the mirror. He stared at the body glitter that had collected along the line of his collarbone throughout the night. Absentmindedly, he traced a finger over it.

Alec stepped closer behind him and watched, wondering how alien it must feel for Bane to not recall significant periods of time. Earlier that night and in the very same seat, Magnus had dusted that glitter everywhere. Bane could only stare at it strangely.

Determinedly, Alec took his eyes off the glistening skin of Bane’s bare chest and focused on the congealed bit of blood in the warlock’s hair. He wiped at it gently with the warm-water-soaked cloth, feeling the hefty lump underneath. He made sure to keep a blank face. Internally, he grimaced at the thought of Bane’s head smacking against the concrete after falling out of his arms on the roof. Bane didn't have runes, obviously. He had no magic to heal with either.

 _Don’t look back_ , Alec told himself before he could spiral into his tendency to overthink. Otherwise, he would dwell for hours on what he could have done differently in those moments that would have protected him better.

He wiped the rest of the blood away and saw the gash wasn’t deep enough to require stitches. “Does it hurt?”

Alec glanced back to the mirror when he didn’t get an answer. Bane was still staring at the glitter that clung to his skin. His eyes were glazed over in a way that told Alec his mind was a million miles away.

After dipping a fresh cloth into water, Alec returned to Bane’s side. Cautiously, he pressed the wet cloth to the warlock’s chest and slowly dragged it over the dip of his clavicle, trying to remove as much of the glitter as he could.

The action snapped Bane’s mind back into the room. He blinked several times as if to refocus.

Alec bit his lip and prepared himself for a harsh tirade, bracing for Bane to push him away yet again.

But it didn’t come.

Instead, he found Bane looking up at him with a fondness he had only ever seen on Magnus.

“Thank you,” Bane murmured softly and looked away again. He didn’t move otherwise, and Alec took that to mean he should continue. For several moments, he silently swabbed away with the washcloth. He ignored the curls of warmth forming deep in his gut as he toweled over the other man’s shoulders, his neck, his chest.

All too soon, though, Alec realized his breath had quickened. It was surprisingly difficult to pull away, but he did it anyway before Bane could hear his heart beating so erratically.

For the most part, Bane had been subdued. But he noticed when Alec took his hand away. Bane stared up at him with questioning eyes. He wanted to squelch the sense of loss that flared through his heart when Alec let him go, but he couldn’t bring himself to ask for what his skin was hungry for. Touch.

Bane’s mouth felt dry and his eyelids heavy. He was bone-weary and unable to push down his feelings. Dangerous feelings. Those soft, hopeful ones with good intentions that always spiraled into heartache eventually.

Alec grabbed his hand, and the stupid feelings bloomed tenfold.

“You have some cuts along your back, Bane. It will be easier for me to clean them if you lie on your stomach.”

“Okay.” It was all Bane could muster as he let Alec lead him over to the bed.

Tiny bits of gravel were embedded in some of the gashes marring Bane’s back. Alec rummaged through the first aid kid for a pair of tweezers as Bane crawled onto the mattress, lowering himself to stretch across the crimson satin of his comforter.

“You don’t have to do this,” Bane broke the silence, suddenly hesitant. He began lifting himself off the bed, but Alec held him by the shoulders and gently pushed him back down.

“I know. But I want to. So just let me take care of you.”

Bane reluctantly obeyed, folding his arms flat against the bed and resting his cheek against them as Alec got to work.

He plucked the gravel pieces out one by one, causing parts of each wound to weep with wet trickles of fresh blood. Bane didn’t flinch through any of it. In fact, he sunk further into the mattress and his breathing evened out.

“You didn’t fall asleep, did you?” Alec asked as he finished digging the last pebble out.

“No,” came the slow response.

“Good. I’m almost finished.” Alec began wiping over and around the cuts, cleaning them up as thoroughly as possible.

Meanwhile, Bane was quite certain he was melting. He drifted under the sheer comfort of Alec’s proximity. He honestly couldn’t remember the last time he had allowed someone to care for him in this way. _Had he ever?_

Something felt so wrong about feeling so … good, and that dread began bleeding into the edges of his current state of bliss. He clutched at the comforter beneath him, wringing the fabric through his fingers. Steeling himself against Alec’s warmth.

 _Stop_ , his mind whispered. He had to make this stop. He had worked too hard to let a twenty-something Shadowhunter uproot this semblance of a life he had so precariously crafted for himself. 

Unaware of the internal struggle raging through the motionless warlock in front of him, Alec scooped with his fingers a glob of Catarina’s healing balm from the black tin. Slowly, he rubbed it over Bane’s cuts.

Bane sucked in a breath of surprise at the first touch of Alec’s fingers directly on his ripped skin. It rendered him speechless. Motionless. Utterly boneless and pliant. Like Alec’s hands held him under a spell.

A full minute passed before he came back to his senses and was able to will himself to speak. He had to end this. Feelings like this would only serve to further disrupt the part of himself he had buried long ago.

“That’s enough.”

Alec’s hands stopped moving, but they remained pressed on Bane’s bare skin.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. I’m sorry that I gave you the impression that this is okay. I shouldn’t have let you do this.”

“Do what? I was just helping.”

“Don't you get it yet?” Bane squirmed out from underneath Alec and rolled off the bed. He settled himself on shaky legs as he fought to regain his bearings. “I don’t want your help.”

“Bane, I know. It’s okay. I’ll stop. Just lie back down, all right?”

“You know nothing,” Bane spat back, crossing his arms across his chest. “This, me. I’m too … too twisted to make sense of. And you. You’re too innocent to understand any of it.”

“But I want to understand. I want to understand you, Bane.”

“Stop!” Bane shouted. Alec’s words were doing something to him. He had to make it stop.

“What made you this way?” Alec’s question was direct, but his words were not harsh or judgmental. They were genuinely curious, sympathetic even.

That hope started to float up inside of Bane again. He shook his head and forced it back down.

“I know what you want… Don’t get attached to him, Alec.”

“Who?”

“Magnus.”

Alec’s stomach dropped. “I … I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh, but you do. On the roof tonight, you called me Magnus... I can’t remember the last two days. It’s because of him.”

So, Bane knew now that Magnus had returned. Alec’s lips formed a tight line. He didn’t know what to say or what that even meant.

“He can’t stay, Alec.”

“I want to help … help you fix whatever all this is.”

“You can’t help!” Bane yelled hoarsely as he clutched at the lip of the nightstand to steady himself. The tornado of emotions that coursed through him had made him suddenly woozy.

Alec wanted to deescalate the moment, but not as much he wanted answers. He wasn’t afraid of Bane’s anger either, so he persisted.

“Magnus told me about an eternal candle that’s connected to you both. Do you know about it?”

Bane’s face paled as he gawked at Alec. “You can’t be serious.”

“I am. It’s real, right?”

“And if it is, then what? What would you do, even if you had it, Shadowhunter?”

“Magnus said the flame needs to be extinguished.”

“Oh, he did, did he?” Bane was trembling with fatigue at this point. His skin had broken into a sweat. _Extinguished_. The word rattled around his brain.

“Do you know where it is?” Alec pressed, hating himself for not stopping. He could see Bane progressively struggle just to remain standing.

“Yes,” Bane said right before his eyes rolled back. He collapsed on the floor in a pile of limbs like a marionette puppet whose strings had just been cut loose. His head thunked against the nightstand.

“Damn it.” Alec rushed over to him. “Bane. Are you okay? Bane!”

Alec hastily scooped the warlock up into his arms, shaking him awake.

Bane blinked, bewildered. His focus fell on Alec hovering above him, and his face grew dark as he regained his senses.

“You want to fix me? Save me?” he rasped dejectedly.

“Yes,” Alec answered honestly. “I really do. But I don’t want to lose my mind trying to figure out yours!”

Alec’s throat closed in on itself when he noticed the curtain of tears forming over Bane’s eyes. “I’m sorry, Bane. I’m sorry.”

The tears only frustrated the warlock more. “Are you even sure Magnus wants to fix it? Why … why do you think I’m like this now?”

The question stopped Alec cold. He had been sure Magnus wanted to stay. So sure. Until that moment. Now, he had never been more confused.

“I will not open myself up in this way again,” Bane vowed even as he drifted asleep in Alec's arms.


End file.
